Pilot's Table
by Devaro Ayanami
Summary: Instrumentality opened a door to an unseen vista of futures. Possibilities spread before the Chosen, none of them permanent, none of them real. Or were they? - Series of one-shots focusing on the Pilots and there friends, rated T just in case. Drabbles.
1. Rooftop Chat

**Neon Genesis Evangelion**

_Pilot's Table_

By D.A.

Beta-ed by Zephyrus Genesis

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Title: Rooftop Chat

Prompt: Set 1 / Prompt 21 (Moonlight)

Word Count: 1553

Rating: k+

Summary: Hikari and Asuka chat on the roof about two of the stooges.

Disclaimer: I do not own Neon Genesis Evangelion or anything connected to it.

Notes: Well, this is my first attempt at the Fifty one-shot challenge. I'm not taking it as an official challenge, but more of a personal challenge to see if I can do it, and to help me improve my writing.

This is set in an AU where Third Impact is avoided.

_As of 02-13-2010, when I finished the first draft, I'm not all that pleased with the ending and plan on going back and editing this one later. For now, though, I'll let it stand._

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"Something positive… Right."

Hikari looked over as her friend made a rather un-lady-like snort. The tempermental red-head had been surprisingly quiet the last few minutes while they waited for Kodama, in one of her rare generous moods, to finish cooking dinner. As they had been waiting, Hikari had tired of watching Asuka play her game system and, truth be told, so had Asuka. So they'd gone to the roof and Asuka had decided to show her intelligence and pass the time by pointing out and correctly naming every constellation they could find in Tokyo-3's night sky.

"Are you talking about the project Ms. Katsuragi gave you and the other Pilots?" Hikari asked, leaning against the railing around the roof as she watched the full moon.

"Of all the hair-brained things that woman has ever come up with," Asuka huffed, spinning around and leaning back against the railing a couple feet away, "This has to be one of the stupidest."

"It can't be that hard can it? I mean, you've know Ikari for almost two years. You've lived with him almost that long too…" Hikari mutter the last sentence before continuing in a normal voice, "And you've known Ayanami that long too."

"Wondergirl isn't a problem. She's… different than when I first got here. She stopped being the commander's doll when he and Shinji had that big fight a while back, and she's… bearable to be around now."

Hikari nods, partly to show she's listening and partly because she agrees. Rei had changed. She had started to reach out to others about a year ago, which Hikari supposed is when Shinji had had his fight with his father. No one would tell her what happened, but she'd heard from Touji that Shinji's father wasn't commander anymore, just not why he wasn't commander. She supposed it would be a secret she'd find out only if she ever joined Nerv.

"But Idiot Shinji… He's a pervert like the other stooges." Asuka sighs, half frustration and half amusement, "He's spineless, and apologizes too much, and is totally whipped. He's a coward and a poor excuse for a male."

"But…" Hikari prompts, feeling Asuka's hesitation.

Asuka frowns, looking like she's trying to decide what to say, or whether she wants to actually say anything at all.

"But… really, if you watch closely, he isn't…" she pauses and growls low in her throat, "He isn't really spineless, he just… doesn't like fighting. He might apologize too much and seem like a coward, but… he isn't a coward. No one can call him that after how he stood up to his father and stopped-"

"Stopped what?" Hikari asks. She knows it might close Asuka back up on the topic of Shinji, but she is almost dying to know what happened to change the once timid boy into a more confident, if still overly shy, young man. An event which seemed to change everyone else connected to Nerv that she knew.

"Classified, internal Nerv business," Asuka smile apologetically, still slightly surprising even after almost a year, "You know how it is."

"That's alright," Hikari sighs, "I guess I'm used to it, since Touji joined Nerv as a Pilot."

Asuka grins, and in the pale moonlight looks like a tigress ready to pounce on its prey.

"How _is_ your stooge doing, by the way? Not trying anything perverted is he?"

"Asuka?!" Hikari blushes, "I've told you: he's not like that with me!"

"So? He's still a stooge." Asuka states, though the slight smile shows she's teasing Hikari.

"What about _your_ stooge?" Hikari grins, "You were just telling me he wasn't all that bad."

"I was not." Asuka sniffs indignantly, "I was simply pointing out how he had changed. Just like Rei's changed and… and I've changed."

Asuka looks out at the slowly rising moon as Hikari waits for her overly moody friend to continue, knowing you don't push Asuka when it comes to emotional things, especially when the emotions concern Shinji.

"I realized… he's stronger than I thought. Maybe… maybe stronger than me." Asuka smirks half-heartedly, "I know I'm always calling him the Invincible Shinji, but sometimes he really is."

"Like how Touji may seem like a jerk all the time, but he isn't really." Asuka snorts, but Hikari continues, "Asuka, if you didn't egg him on so much, you two might actually get along."

Asuka sighed and half turned to face her friend, her expression calm and a little amused.

"What makes you think we aren't getting along?"

"But you're always fighting and arguing!"

"But I don't smack him on occasion like I used to. And you don't have to restrain him from trying to take me on." Asuka points out, smirking, and Hikari realizes she's right. They sometimes even smile when they're tearing into each other with their insults.

"You're just playing?" she sounds dubious, frowning at Asuka with just a touch of confusion.

"Mostly." Asuka shrugs, "Sometimes we aren't, but not when you or Shinji are nearby."

"Why?"

"You're my best friend, Hikari. And before Rei stopped being a doll and Shinji grew a spine, you were my only friend." Asuka sighs, "Touji and I made an agreement a few months after Shinji stopped his dad. I would tone it down around you, and he'd do the same when around Shinji."

"Shinji?" Hikari asked, and Asuka nodded.

"Shinji doesn't like Touji egging me on any more than you like me pissing off Touji," Asuka smirked, "Idiot thought I wasn't close enough to hear him telling Touji to lay off his insults."

Hikari and Asuka share a chuckle. Hikari knew, however, from some of her chats with Touji, that Shinji tended to let Asuka hear him when he was displaying his spine. Touji had said Shinji knows very well how good Asuka's hearing is. All that was secondary to what Hikari wanted to hear Asuka say however.

"Asuka, do you really think he's as bad as you try and make him out to be?"

Asuka stills, facing the full moon, but her eyes are distant as she again seems to be debating internally. Finally, she murmurs something to quiet for Hikari to hear.

"What, Asuka?"

"I said no, he's not really that bad…" Asuka turns away from Hikari.

"So? What are some of his good points then? You can tell me, it's not like I'm gonna try and steal him." Hikari prods.

Asuka snorts, then sighs, resigned.

"He watches the moon with me."

"Huh?"

Asuka spins to face the rising moon, a faint smile on her face.

"He watches the moon rise with me." Asuka looks over at her long time friend, frowning slightly, "Not long after he stood up to his father, Unit-Two started to develop problems in its Bio-components. So did Unit-Zero, but at the time I didn't hear the reports on Zero, just the ones for my Unit-Two. All I could think about was my whole world was falling apart along with my Eva."

"Because Eva was your life." Hikari whispers. Asuka nodded slowly.

"I was sure it was going to be the end of me. I spent a lot of time in my room, or out on the balcony watching the stars and moon. When I wasn't pitching a fit, anyways." Asuka's expression faded from a frown to a slight smile, "But he just weathered it. Weathered me. He'd wait in the kitchen until I came out hungry and would make whatever I asked for."

"How sweet!" Hikari's voice was still quiet, but the faint note of envy was still there. _I wish Touji would cook a lunch for me one time. _Asuka continued as if Hikari hadn't spoken.

"Sometimes at night I'd go outside on the balcony and stargaze. When I'd turn to go back in, I'd spot him ducking down the hall. Somehow, he'd know when I got up, and would watch from to door while I was outside."

Asuka smiled, and this time Hikari contained her comment and waited for her friend to continue.

"After the third time, I got tired of feeling like he was spying on me and told him to come outside with me or stay in bed." Asuka chuckled, "After babbling for a bit, he walked out and leaned against the railing beside me, just a couple feet away. After that he always stood nearby and watched the moon with me."

"He never talked?" Hikari asked.

"Just once, when I caught him staring at me."

"What did he say?"

"I demanded to know why he was staring, and he said he hadn't realize how beautiful I was in the moonlight."

"That's so romantic." Hikari said, and Asuka snorted.

"It was the corniest thing I'd heard since college back in Germany, and I told him so." Asuka chuckled, "He snorted, _snorted_, at me and said: I'm not a frat boy."

Hikari's jaw dropped open, and she stared at Asuka.

"That's what I did." Asuka nodded, "Then I just started chuckling, and he joined in."

"Hey! Pigtail and Firebrand! Dinner's finished!" a young woman yells from the door to the roof and ducks back inside and down the stairs.

Asuka pushes off from the railing and starts walking, and Hikari follows a moment later. As they near the door, Asuka looks back past Hikari at the full moon. Smiling, she goes inside.


	2. I Promised, You Promised

**Neon Genesis Evangelion**

_Pilot's Table_

By D.A.

Beta-ed by Zephyrus Genesis

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Title: I Promised, You Promised

Prompt: Set 1 / Prompt 8 (Promise)

Word Count: 1222

Rating: T

Summary: Asuka made a promise to Touji, and finds out he made the same promise without even knowing it.

Disclaimer: I do not own Neon Genesis Evangelion or anything connected to it.

Notes: This one is based in my AU I'm Needed. As of the time of this writing, Feb 2010, I have only about five chapters for my fanfic, and find myself hit with writer's block. Hopefully, this will get me going again.

(02-14-2010) Again, I'm not to sure about the ending. But I'll let it be until I've finished the remaining 48 one-shots.

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"I promised. Did you hear me?" Asuka whispers, shoulders tense.

Touji listens from the door of the children's room as Asuka checked on Shinji, Rei, and Mari, asleep in their beds.

"Yeah, I heard ya." he gruffly whispers back, looking as tense as she did. Asuka straightens up before turning to him.

"I wasn't kidding, stooge." she glares, and he jerks his head in a nod.

"I know," he nods his head towards the living room, "When you're kiddin', ya fling a lot a insults."

Asuka walks past Touji and into the living room, flopping down on the small sofa, none of the tension leaving her frame. Touji walks in just as tense and sits on the small, overstuff chair he'd bought after Nerv moved him into the building.

He'd originally had his own apartment, but his little sister, and Rei and Shinji, had convinced Asuka and him to move into Asuka's apartment. But, he didn't really mind too much. He'd be the first to admit he can't really cook, and Mari would agree the way only eight year olds can: innocently blunt.

The fact that the two older kids worked together and gave him and Asuka some breathing room after school and Nerv was nice too. But no matter how good they'd been today, it just hadn't helped. Nearly dying at the hands of an Angel that was controlling an Eva that you didn't know if it was Piloted or not tends to make you that level of tense.

"Things are getting harder…" she whispers, barely loud enough for him to hear, and he nods.

"If I heard Fuyutsuki right, we only have four more."

Both young teens sigh, the sound seeming far older than it should coming from ones as young as them, and Asuka turns and lays down on the sofa. Silence reigns for several moments before Touji speaks, hesitant at first, but slowly growing more confident.

"I've been thinkin' …"

"Does it hurt?" Asuka quips, interrupting him, sensing the seriousness in his voice without seeing the concentration on his face.

"I've been thinkin'. About while I was trapped in Unit-One…"

Asuka sits up, looking at him with a blank expression, but all her attention is focused on him.

"I remember bits and pieces from when I was in there. There was a woman… brown haired and blue eyed, like Shinji."

"Yui." Asuka whispers the woman's name, her voice neutral. Touji shrugs.

"I think we talked for a while, her askin' questions and me answerin' them. She said Shinji and Rei are very important."

"Damn right they are."

"Asuka, let me finish." Touji snaps quietly, and Asuka stills, "She said we have to keep them safe. Made me promise her and everythin' ."

Touji pauses, looking like he was arguing with himself over whether or not to say more. After a few moments, he spoke again.

"Then, we talked some more. It was 'bout you this time…"

"What?!" Asuka blurts, staring at him, and Touji refuses to look her in the face and turns away.

"I don't remember what we said, except… except she made me promise something' else…" he turns back to face her, faint red on his cheeks, but his face hardened and neutral, "The same promise you made to try and get me back."

"I promise I'll help you…" she whispers looking down the hall to the kid's room.

"Tuh keep'em safe…" he whispers and follows her gaze down the hall.

"And I won't ever leave you…"

"Jus' don't leave me."

"Manipulative bitch, isn't she?" Asuka asks, looking down at the carpet in the middle of the room.

"Just forceful…"

Asuka snaps her gaze up to Touji's face at the tone of humor in his voice. He was faintly smiling.

"Between the you I see out there in battle, and the you I see here with those kid…."

"What…?" she whispers, edgy, but still curious.

"I'll stay as long as ya let me… heck, maybe long after ya scream at me to leave." his face becomes serious, "I'm tired Asuka. Tired of Eva and Angels and being by myself."

"What if I'm not done standing by myself? Hmm?" Asuka questions, tense and defensive.

"I am, Asuka." he says, eyes searching, "Aren't you? I've proven myself. I'm not the best, but I bet I'm at least you're equal. And _I'm_ almost past tired of standing alone."

They sit in a tense silence, both searching the other's expression for some hint of the other's thoughts. Finally, after what seemed like hours but was only a couple minutes, Asuka almost imperceptibly nods her head, her gaze locks with his.

"I-I'll let you close…" she whispers, face still blank as his, eyes unsure like his, "But if you leave again…"

"Hikari will kill me, If I don't end it myself." He smiles faintly, "You, my sister, and those two kids are too important to me for me to willingly leave."

Asuka's eye widen as she quietly sucks in a breath at his declaration. Touji stands up slowly, and Asuka stands up quickly, tense and ready to attack or run as he approaches the sofa. He stops just outside her personal space.

"I'm done being alone with Eva. Can we at least lean on each other?" his voice quiet, his body tense, and Asuka again gives him a tiny dip and rise of her chin. Looking down, she mumbles something, her right hand twitching as if she's fighting it from moving. She mumbles again, louder.

"Mama's not close enough." she looks up, a faint shine in her eyes, as finally one hand and then the other lift slowly.

Touji steps closer, and the two teens slide into a tense, edgy, embarrassed hug. Slowly, the tension leaves them, and they move from simply standing in each other's arms to holding and leaning into each other.

"I'm tired…" Asuka says shakily, her chin on Touji's shoulder.

"Me too," he murmurs, not moving. Asuka smirks tiredly.

"That means you can let go."

"You first." and Asuka can hear the faint smile in his voice.

"Maybe… carry me." she says suddenly, and can feel Touji jerk at the request.

"You-I hav'ta-say what?!?" he babbles, and Asuka chuckles, grinning.

"You heard me just fine, Stooge: carry me."

"Al-alright, Devil" he gulps, then carefully lowers one arm down to her knees and swings it up, keeping the other arm behind her shoulders. Asuka squeaks and jerks her arms from his back to around his neck as he carries her bridal style to her room, and sets her on her bed. Touji stands up and steps back, to see Asuka's face as red as his feels.

"Good night, Touji." she says, sitting up and watching him leave the room.

"G'night, Asuka. I'll see ya tomorrow."

Touji gently closes the door, then crosses the hall to what was Shinji's room before he moved in. Asuka slept in Rei's old room, and the children all shared Asuka's old room.

Going in and sitting down on his futon, Touji flops back and puts his hands behind his head as he lays and stares at the ceiling. As the two teens drift off, neither can shake the feeling of still being warm and safe in the others arms, and silently hope they get to see where it might one day lead them.


	3. Dreams

**Neon Genesis Evangelion**

_Pilot's Table_

By D.A.

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Title: Dreams

Prompt: Set 1 / Prompt 23 (Wish)

Word Count: 908

Rating: k+

Summary: Hikari asks a seemly simple question, and everything starts anew.

Disclaimer: I do not own Neon Genesis Evangelion or anything connected to it.

Notes: Well, I seem to be on a roll --one one-shot every two days-- so here's number three. The last two have shown a classic pairing and a never written of pairing, that I know of anyways, so this time I'll go for one of the other pairings I like: Shinji x Hikari. This one is so AU, I'm not even sure where to start. It's also the first one I'm perfectly happy with, unlike the last two. Probably won't do much editing to this one when I go back through.

_Written while listening to Meteor Show by Owl City_

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"--what would you wish for?"

"Huh?" Shinji said, and winced. _Eloquent as ever, Shinji. On top of not listening._

"You heard me," Hikari gently elbowed him, smiling, "If you could have any wish, what would you wish for?"

"I-I'm not sure…What-what would you wish for Hikari?" he stammered, hoping to gain some time to think of an honest, and acceptable, response.

Hikari hummed, a single non-committal noise, and looked across the school courtyard. Shinji followed her gaze through the glowing noonday atmosphere to where Kensuke was busy with his ever present camcorder, taping everything Touji and Asuka were doing while everyone was eating lunch.

"I guess…" Hikari mused, smiling, "I guess I'd wish for my friends to be happy."

Shinji returned her smile, thinking her answer was so like her. The responsible, caring friend. Shinji never wanted her to change, and knew their friends all thought the same in that regard. After a moment, she nudged him, arching an eyebrow. Shinji directed his gaze to his feet stretched out in front of him, as he searched for an answer.

"I-I guess… I'd want the same thing. I'd want them safe and happy, with anything that could hurt them far away and long gone…" he paused, his gaze flicked farther from Hikari's face as he continued in a quieter tone, "Even if it cost me everything I have, everything I am… I'd make sure my friends are safe and happy…"

He jumped as Hikari lightly laid her fingers on his arm, squeezing gently. Turning his gaze back to Hikari's face, he found her smiling sadly.

"I know you would. I'm glad we got this time," she nodded in the direction of Asuka and Touji, "That they got this time. I wish it was longer."

The world around them faded but for Touji and Asuka, who walked over to them through the now featureless orange reality.

"This is where it ends." Asuka said, hand in hand with Touji, "The dream's run its course, even if we don't want it to stop."

"We have to wake up sometime," Touji nodded to Shinji, "I'm glad we got to dream at all buddy."

Rei appearred suddenly, a beautiful young adult with waist-length lavender-blue hair and shining crimson eyes smiling at each of them, and they knew without being told it was Lilith they were seeing.

"I held it as long as my powers would allow. Now the dream fades, and the world comes back from the edge." the woman said as she turned to Shinji, "Reality will be remade by your choices here, dear Shinji."

"Whatever you choose, Shinji, I'll still be here." Hikari said from beside him.

"And so will we." Asuka affirmed, backed by a confident nod from Touji.

Shinji closed his eyes, and took a deep breath, recalling everything he'd done with his friends. Recalling the wish he had just told Hikari.

"Will they still be there?" he asked, and opened his eyes to find only Lilith standing there. Suddenly, a young woman with short brown hair and glistening green eyes faded into view, and he gasped. His mother. Running to her, he threw his arms around her as she hugged him back.

"Do you want them there, sweetie?" she asked quietly, smiling through the tears in her eyes.

"Of course I do!" he cried, happy to have his mother, even though he knew he'd soon lose her again when Third Impact faded, "But I want you there too!"

"I know sweetie, and I wish I could." she turned his face to her, still smiling, "But I paid that price so you could be happy. So you wouldn't have to give up everything to make sure your friends are happy and safe."

"But I won't be happy if you aren't there!"

"As long as you live, you can be happy. Weren't you happy with Hikari and the others, even here in a dream?" Yui stood up, her hands on his shoulders, "They'll be waiting for you, when you wake up."

"Are you sure you can't come?" he asked, wiping the tears from his eyes, and she smileed sadly.

"I'm sure, love. But I'll always be there in your heart." Yui began to fade and Lilith return, along with his friends,_ "Remember: As long as you keep living, anywhere can be heaven."_

Shinji turned to Hikari and his friends. His family. Warmth filled him when he thought that, and he smiled for them. They returned the smile with their own, and Hikari walked over to him. She took his hand in her own, both of them blushing, and Shinji turned to Lilith.

"I've made my choice."

"From the shattered remains of the old, a shining new is raised." Lilith said, and Rei appeared beside her.

"From the choices of the Broken Chosen, new paths spread out to the future." Rei continued.

"Ready everyone?" Shinji asked, as the orange reality began to slowly fade away.

"Always, dude."

"Like you could stop me."

"I am, Shinji. I'm here."

Rei and Lilith shared a smile, before Lilith gestured Rei to join the group. Her eyes widened in surprise and Rei turned to Shinji and the others to find them smiling, his and Hikari's arms open to her. As she ran to them, tears in her eyes, the orange light faded completely when she reached them and she missed Lilith's last whispered words.

"And though light has not yet touched the new roads, the hope of the Broken Chosen leads them on to a shining new future. I love you, my daughter."


	4. You Do, I Do

**Neon Genesis Evangelion**

_Pilot's Table_

By D.A.  
Beta-ed by SithKnight-Galen

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Title: You do, I do

Prompt: Set 1 / Prompt 02 (Hate)

Word Count: 856

Rating: k+

Summary: An overheard conversation, and a missed surprise.

Disclaimer: I do not own Neon Genesis Evangelion or anything connected to it.

Notes: This should be interesting… a/n at bottom.

_Okay, before I started this one, I had decided not to upload any of my one-shots until they were all finished… but after staring at a blank page for almost a week and not being able to write at all, I figured "I'll upload them slowly and hopefully get some helpful feedback." 2010/03/02_

_I'm still waiting for more than "I like it, keep going!"………2010/03/27_

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"I hate this."

"Hate what?"

"This!"

"What about it?"

"It's.. it's green!"

"You don't like green?…"

"Don't look at me like that!"

"Sorry!"

"There you go again! Stop apologizing!"

"Sor- Okay."

"…better… now, help me find one in red."

"What about the one back there?"

"Wrong shade."

"But you haven't even looked at it!"

"I can tell from here."

"…"

00000

"Do ya think Asuka knows she left her phone on?" Touji quietly asked Hikari, as she walked back into her living room holding a fussy, but now sleeping, 1-yr old baby.

"We should hang up. It sounds like she doesn't know she didn't actually hang up on her end."

Touji scratches his head, then waves for her to sit.

"Nah, Shin-man hasn't been bein' to open 'bout anything the last few weeks… I think he has somethin' planned."

"You always think he has something planned," she says, eyeing him doubtfully, "Kensuke too, for that matter, but he isn't always around for you to spy on."

"Shh, they're talking again!"

00000

"Shinji…"

"Yes, Asuka?"

"What about blue?"

"Huh?"

"Real eloquent there, Shakespeare. What do you think about blue instead of red?"

"I think that one would match your eyes."

"So you do look higher than my chest."

"I'd- bu- yo-… What's that supposed to mean? I am not Touji!"

00000

Hikari arches an eyebrow and glances at Touji.

"I do NOT stare at her chest!" he retorts at the phone, then spots Hikari's look, "I know, I know. But I was fourteen! Do you see me doin' that kinda thing any more?"

"True… You don't really look at other girl's chests or butts… just mine." she finishes, giving an almost Asuka-like smirk while Touji sputters as he try to form some sort of reply or come-back.

00000

"Did you hear something?"

"No."

"Oh well. So, Blue or Red?"

"Red?"

"Blue it is then."

"Huh?"

00000

"Typical Asuka." Hikari notes, setting the sleeping infant in the foldaway crib next to the small sofa she has, then sits next to Touji who stares at the phone the same way Shinji is probably staring at Asuka: confused.

00000

"Hey, Shinji…"

"Is something wrong, Asuka?"

"Never mind, maybe later."

"Ok…"

00000

"Just hang up Touji, we aren't going to hear anything interesting. Besides, Asuka will tell me if anything happens, and I'll let you know if your that curious."

"Alright, alright," Touji reaches over and clicks the speaker phone key, and the phone hangs up, "You're probably right, Hikari."

"Of course, now go get the door, I think I heard someone knocking."

00000000000

"You did what?!?"

"I proposed! What are you, deaf?"

Hikari gaped at her friend of nine years, shock warring with glee on her face. Finally, glee won out and Hikari gathered Asuka into a hug, squealing happily like a school girl.

"I can't believe it! _You _proposed to_ him_!"

"Because I hated it."

"Hated what?" Hikari said, blinking at the sudden statement, pulling away slightly to watch her friend's expression.

"The waiting." Asuka frowned, her expression far away and almost sad, "I was tired of waiting. We'd never get married if I waited for him to change the situation."

"That's not-"

"Don't tell me that's not true. You and I both know he gets too set into a routine." Asuka then smiled, the joy seeming to flow off her as she raised her left hand, "But this time you would have been right, if I'd been just a little more patient."

And there, on her left ring finger, was an engagement ring. Hikari stared at it for a moment, then looked to Asuka.

"He just smiled at me, then got down on one knee with me and pulled out his own velvet box. I couldn't believe what I was seeing!"

"You proposed to each other!" Hikari squealed, hugging Asuka again.

"It's the weirdest feeling, Hikari. Know what I mean?"

"Yeah, yeah I do." Hikari agreed, pulling back and showing Asuka her wedding band. Asuka smirked, remembering that particular day.

"Do you think… we'll be good parents?" Asuka asked, her smirk fading to a frown and a far away look, "I think that's what I, we, hate the most. Our failed parents."

"Asuka…"

"It's ok, Hikari, you can tell me…" she said, shoulders slumping.

"You'll be great parents, Asuka," Hikari said, smiling when Asuka looked at her, "I've seen you with Rei's daughter. And we've both seen Shinji with kids at the park."

"Your right, I just…"

"One step at a time."

"Yeah. What's that sound?" Asuka asks as a faint ringing filled the quiet room.

"My cell!" Hikari yelps, then runs to the kitchen, "Hello?… Touji?… Calm down!… Better, now, say that again?"

Asuka got up from the sofa and walked over to the kitchen entrance, and watched Hikari struggle to hold in her laughter.

"No Touji, I'm not- not laughing at you. But you see, Asuka's here, and she just told me the same thing." Hikari looked to Asuka, tears of mirth in her eyes from holding in her laughter, "Yes dear, Asuka and Shinji proposed to each other right after you hung up the phone."

_AN: Yeah… I seem to be stuck on waff. Hopefully no one is high on all this sugar. Number four down, for now, and I may go back and change the last half of the chapter later. Now to set up for number five…_


	5. Behold, Eva!

_**Neon Genesis Evangelion**_

_Pilot's Table_

By D.A.

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Title: Behold, Eva!

Prompt: Set 1 / Prompt 32 (Discover)

Word Count: 1380

Rating: T

Summary: Though they called for Shinji, Asuka will Pilot.

Disclaimer: I do not own Neon Genesis Evangelion or anything connected to it. I don't own anything connected to Xena. I do not own anything connected to Tang either.

Notes: I've come across a few fanfics where Shinji and Asuka knew each other when they were little, before Eva. Well, let them discover Eva. Together since the crib.

_Obviously AU. Not an X-over._

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"Shinji…" Asuka turned to Shinji and whispered, both of them standing behind Misato, the odd woman conversing with a blond in a lab coat who had introduced herself as a Doctor Ritsuko Akagi.

"Yeah, Asuka?" he whispered back, glancing for a second time through the booklet Misato had given them when she picked them up.

"Pull your nose out of the book for a minute and pay attention!" she hissed, annoyed at him for not paying attention, while the blond doctor argued a point with the purple haired captain.

"Didn't you hear Miss Katsuragi?" he asked her, jerking his gaze up from the booklet, confused as to why she upset with him.

"She said something about Eva. I _know_ I remember hearing about it before, and it wasn't from reading that booklet!" she returned, frowning at him. How could he believe he'd find something by looking a second time when it wasn't there the first time?

"How do you know it isn't in the book?" Shinji asked her, puzzled.

"Because," she said, sounding as if she were talking to a young child, which really they both were, "I looked through it while you were gawking at the Geofront."

Shinji ducked his head, wincing under the focused attention of his fiery friend. It was at this point that the elevator stopped at its destination, the door opening to reveal a catwalk over pink-tinted liquid and a dock with an inflatable boat waiting. Once they had all climbed aboard, Misato started its motor and set out for the far side of the cavernous room. Upon reaching the dock, and getting out of and tying off the boat, Ritsuko lead them to the heavy security door and put in her code.

"Build the suspense why don't you!" Asuka snapped once they had entered the darkened room beyond the security door, annoyed further.

Floodlights clicked on, filling the large room with harsh white-yellow light, and revealing the huge head and broad shoulders of a purple monster. Both Shinji and Asuka jerked back from it, and Asuka's breath caught in her throat.

It was the wrong color, and the face was shaped wrong but…

"Mama…" she breathed, barely loud enough for Shinji to hear her, a faint memory suddenly becoming sharp. He spared her a glance before the lights in a room hanging from the roof flickered on to reveal the reason Shinji, and thus Asuka, was there: Supreme Commander Gendo Rokobungi, Shinji's father and Asuka's godfather.

"It has been awhile, Shinji, Asuka." his voice echoed in the room, calm, if ever so faintly sad.

No one seemed to noticed anything beyond the calm.

"Father…" Shinji breathed, unsure how to react to Gendo. They'd avoided each other completely for two years now, their only link being Asuka and her determination not to be ignored by her godfather.

"Awhile? How about: For. Freaking. Ever!?" Asuka snapped, not effected by the attempt at intimidation in the slightest, her annoyance peaking.

Ritsuko arched a brown eyebrow, and Misato gaped open-mouthed at the two Children. Or more accurately, at Asuka. Asuka ignored both of them however.

"I will admit to being remiss in my visits as of late, and will correct that… Later. For now, you must be briefed on this beast, and the threat you met when the Captain-" here he directed his calm gaze at Misato, "retrieved you from the train station."

Taking that as her queue, Ritsuko stepped towards the Children and gestured to the purple thing in the center of the pink lake, a gesture that made it seem as if she were presenting a trophy. Which, in a way, she was.

"This is Evangelion Unit One, the second completed, combat-capable, cybernetic fighting-vehicle that is Nerv's primary tool in the defense of Earth against the Angels."

"I know what it is." Asuka said curtly, her memory of a red Evanglion mostly clear, startling the three adults, though Gendo didn't show his surprise, "It's just like the one that took mama. What I want to know is what you want us here for."

"One of you must Pilot it." Gendo said simply.

"I'll do it." Asuka stated firmly, "Just tell me what to do."

She would take the risk. She could feel the danger, or she imagined she could, surrounding this thing. It was a tool for combat, for fighting. For hurting.

For killing.

Shinji wasn't meant for fighting, he was meant to be playing his cello, or cooking great meals. He should be a doctor, not a fighter. Fighting was Asuka's domain.

Xena, that's who she was. A guy had called her that once, a year back, when she had kicked him and his cronies out of the schoolyard when they had been bullying Shinji, for what reason he never told her. She'd looked it up, and found she liked the image of a warrior princess.

"Are you sure she can Pilot it?" Asuka heard Misato ask Ritsuko, the Doctor calling out instructions to some of the techs around the Cage, "I thought Shinji was the intended Pilot?"

"If Unit One won't accept her, then it will be as simple as pulling her out and sliding Shinji in." she replied off-handedly. Asuka stared at her. She'd what?!

"Do you even care what happens to these kids?" Misato asked, incredulous. Ritsuko shot her a glare out of the corner of her eye before replying.

"Hell of a time to grow a conscience, Katsuragi." Ritsuko's reply was short and cold, her tone of voice told Misato she'd asked the wrong question of her best friend.

"I'm sorry Ritz, it's just-"

"I know." Ritsuko cut her off gently, then turned to Asuka, "We don't have a plugsuit that would fit your figure. We had only been expected Shinji."

Asuka smiled inwardly at Ritsuko's comment about her figure, but frowned slightly at her mention of thinking only Shinji would come.

"Thus, you'll simply have to Pilot as is." Ritsuko waved her hand, as if to cut off any comment from Asuka, "We'll have spare clothes in your size by the time you return from this sortie."

Asuka frowned, why would she need spare clothes after Piloting a giant robot? She'd just sit in a chair and use whatever controls are there. Probably a couple of joysticks, a few buttons, and a lever or two.

"Shinji," Asuka said, turning to find him waiting nearby, watching her with a nervous expression, "Stay safe."

"I will Asuka."

Next, Asuka turned to Misato, said fiercely, "You're going to the bridge, or wherever? Take Shinji, and guard him with your life."

Misato nodded, feeling, despite herself, like she had just gotten a direct order from the last person she ever wanted to cross. A fourteen-year old girl with a crush. Or was she a fourteen-year old sister?

Asuka smiled at Shinji one more time, then followed Ritsuko across the catwalk and around to behind the Eva. Ritsuko briefed her on the basics of Eva Piloting while the entry plug, as she learned it was called, was removed and prepped for her to Pilot in.

It was both deceptively simpler and yet more complex than she had thought it would be.

Think walk and it will. Thought makes action. Got it.

Asuka climbed into the plug and sat in the command chair. It was obviously sized for someone her age. She was comfortable sitting there in her jeans and t-shirt and, when the plug sealed-up, felt safe. The controls consisted of two butterfly handles, which had several switches in the hand guard, and looked like they could be pulled back and up into regular joysticks.

Asuka took a deep breath, and a window opened up to her right. A crystal-clear flat-hologram floated over her right hand and displayed an older, dark haired version of Ritsuko.

"Hello Asuka, my name is Naoko Akagi." the woman said, sounding very much like Ritsuko, but her words weren't as clipped, "I'll guide you through the activation of the Evangelion. Ready?"

"Yeah, just get it over with. I've got a monster to beat up." Asuka returned, ready to get this all over with and go home.

As the Plug filled with a strange orange-tinted liquid, she wished she hadn't have been in such a rush.

_What is this stuff? Tang?!_

_0_

_0_

_Hints at a Kyoko/Gendo relationship like the one implied by Gregg Landsman in his story "Walking in the Shadow of Dreams" is authorized by the aforementioned author._

_(He said I could copy that part of his story.)_


	6. Loss

**Neon Genesis Evangelion**

_Pilot's Table_

By D.A.

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Title: Loss

Prompt: Set 1 / Prompt 50 (Writer's Choice)

Word Count: 1636

Rating: T

Summary: Asuka recalls the loss of one of the Children with Hikari.

Disclaimer: I do not own Neon Genesis Evangelion or anything connected to it.

Notes: Had a moment of inspiration while I was writing for another prompt, and just had to continue it.

Not sure about the length/ending, but I'll leave it for now.

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"I used to drink a lot more often than once a year…"

Hikari, sitting next to her old friend at the empty bar, turned and looked at the fiery-tempered red-head. Asuka turned the glass back and forth in her hand, staring into the amber liquid as if looking for a lost friend.

"I started right after I got back to Nerv-Berlin." Asuka tipped the glass to her lips, taking a slow drink, "If you know where to look, you can find bars that will serve anyone who can see and reach over the counter."

Hikari kept her silence, waiting for her long-time friend to continue. Asuka didn't talk about back then very often. None of them really did.

"I figured, if it worked for Misato, why not me." she shrugged, again staring into the glass, "She would find me an hour or so later, roaring drunk, screaming. She never told me what I was screaming about, but I could guess…"

"Shinji…" Hikari guessed, breathing the name. Shinji's name had been taboo to mention around the red-head since back then, Misato telling her and Asuka's friends not to mention the lost Pilot around the girl.

"Yeah…" Asuka cut herself off, taking a shaky breath, "I had nightmares for awhile, I'd see those things…"

Asuka threw back the rest of the beer and pushed away from the counter. Hikari drank the last of her soda and followed the red-head out and to the car. It was cold this time of year in Tokyo-3, especially this late at night, the seasons having begun to be noticeable again after nearly forty years since Second Impact.

Looking up, Hikari could just make out the edge of the Geofront. After civilization had returned to the area, it was determined that the blast that opened it up to the sky had removed to much surface area to ever again enclose the Geofront. So now, every evening on her way home from work at her restaurant, Hikari would look at the stars through the circle of open sky.

Hearing Asuka gasp, she jerked head gaze down to her friend. Asuka was staring in shock, eyes filling with tears, at the car. Following her gaze, Hikari found it wasn't the car, but the young man standing beside it.

_No_, she thought in shock, _it can't be_…

Shinji, hazy like from a dream, seemed to float an inch or two off the ground beside Asuka's borrowed Renault Alpine. His mouth moved, but Hikari couldn't hear what was said.

"I miss you… Shinji…" Asuka whispered, her voice shaky, when he seemed to stop for a moment, "Every single day, idiot."

Shinji seemed to smile. A sad smile that showed both happiness and regret. Asuka shakily returned the smile.

And then he was gone, drawing another gasp from Asuka, a gasp like one makes when pained.

Both young women gazed unblinking at the spot the boy's ghost had stood. Slowly, like feather, Asuka sank to her knees as she continued to stare beyond the car, back to another time and place.

Hikari carefully walked over to her best friend, kneeling beside her. Asuka took a shaky breath and wrapped her arms around her middle.

"We… I'd just told him, demanding and self-confident as ever, that I would grace him with being his date at the dance that Friday. He… he'd stuttered and blushed like normal, and _damn_ if I didn't let myself admit it made him cute. Then he stood up from his homework and told me, calm as he could be at least around me, that I would sit down."

Hikari smiled, she remembered Touji-- and here her own heart clinched --tell her that Shinji was going with Asuka to the dance, so would she like to go with him.

"Well, he got up and walked over to me, blushing like mad. After a second he asked if he could go to the dance with me. He didn't stutter or pause, or anything." Asuka smiled, "The next two days were the best I'd ever had…"

"And then… It all fell apart." tears started silently falling from her eyes as she turned to look at Hikari, "Hikari, do you trust me? I need to tell you, you're my friend, but I've NEVER been able to talk about that day…"

"Of _course _I trust you!" Hikari insisted, unsure what Asuka meant by telling her but not talking.

"Ok, just… don't run away." Asuka turn to fully face Hikari, and a faint orange glow wrapped around her hands as she slowly reached for Hikari's. Hikari froze, watching as Asuka's glowing hands took hold of her own. After a moment, Hikari thought she could hear Asuka crying, but it was in her head. Then everything blacked out.

000

When her vision cleared, Hikari had no control over what she did, and somehow realized she was seeing things the way Asuka had.

It was Asuka's memory of that horrid day.

The Entry-plug lit-up, the soft, orange tint vanishing as power flowed through circuits and energy surged through the Eva's limbs. Voices screamed or yelled through the radio as she swung the beast's arms up and stepped forward, shearing the cage restraints off her chariot's armor. She had no time to waste, Shinji was alone on the surface and needed her, the Great Asuka Langley Sohryu, to get up there and kick some butt.

Reaching one of the catapults to the Geofront surface, Asuka used her Eva's remote overrides to activate it and send her racing for the surface. Reaching the top she gained a quick glimpse of the area: Shinji in Unit-01 was grappling with a white, eyeless Evangelion and winning, bodies of several others scattered about, but there were still three awaiting their turn. When she arrived, two turned to face her, the slug-like heads splitting in a disgusting mockery of a grin as she charged them.

Violence sang its song in her ears as she drew her Eva's combat knife, the two-story handle extending an equally long blade as she swung it down through the shoulder of the closer of the two white cyborgs, slicing it's arm clean off in a spray of red blood which coated her Eva from right shoulder to right foot.

Dropping and rolling to avoid the second MP-Eva's clumsy grapple attempt, she slammed into something she hadn't noticed a moment ago: a wide, flat blade as tall as her Eva, with a two-handed grip in the middle and slightly off to one side. Perfect, she thought as she dropped her knife and gripped the blade by the handle.

Swinging the blade around as she stood, she slammed it into and through the other beast's legs, chopping them off, the blood pouring from the wounds mixing with the blood from the Eva with the missing arm.

Grinning, Asuka continued the spin and brought the blade around and into MP-Armless's side, not quite managing to cut it in half as the blade crushed and cut into the creature.

Hikari felt sick at the bloodshed, though Asuka had not at the time, but what came next chilled her to the core: a scream. A blood curdling scream of pain, rage, and defeat.

In Asuka's memory she had dropped the Blade and spun to face Unit-01. She saw it pinned to the pyramid there in the center of the Geofront with what looked like a two-pronged spear, _Lance of Longinus_, the last standing white Eva leering at him with its disgusting maw.

Asuka charged, praying it wasn't to late, but knew she was too late when Unit-01 went limp and the radio became silent.

No, no, No, No, NO, NO, NO! Rang through Asuka's memory, both in her mind and out her mouth. She raged, tearing at the white monster that turned to her. Her vision, and thus her memory, was red.

When her sight cleared, she found pieces of white Eva covering her hands and the ground. Ignoring it, at least for a little while, Asuka knelt her Eva next to Shinji's pierced chariot. Ejecting the 'Plug, she scrambled as quickly as she could over to Shinji's already ejected plug. Climbing in through the wreckage in the side of the pyramid and over to the side of the plug, Asuka grabbed the handle of the emergency hatch, and with strength born of terror and rage, spun the handle and slammed the hatch open.

Empty.

No, not empty. Shinji's blood-stained plugsuit lay in the chair. But no sign of Shinji.

While Hikari was puzzled, Asuka simply began to scream at the purple cyborg. She raged at it for taking Shinji again. Hikari didn't know it had taken him before, and that was when a hint of memory of the Fourteenth Angel and its aftermath floated by.

Before Hikari could begin to view that memory, she suddenly found herself staring at her friend, back in the real world, and Asuka's tears now flowed freely down her face.

"That was how I lost him…" Asuka said, her voice breaking, her mask of strength finally slipping completely, and she began to sob. "But… but he isn't _really_ g-gone… sometimes… sometimes, l-like just now… I _see_ him, Hikari. Like he's really standing there!"

When Asuka had started talking Hikari had gathered her into a hug, and at her friends revelation that this had not been the first time an apparition of the Third Children had visited her, Hikari held her tighter.

She was going to have a _talk _with that purple monster, if she had to go through every single member of what was left of Nerv to do it. She'd lost her boyfriend to the wars that followed the aborted Third Impact, and she'd be damned if she didn't at least try to get her friend the love of her life back.


	7. The Plan

**Neon Genesis Evangelion**

_Pilot's Table_

By D.A.

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Title: The Plan

Prompt: Set 1 / Prompt 40 (Mistake)

Word Count: 325

Rating: T

Summary: It was for her, but in the end it failed.

Disclaimer: I do not own Neon Genesis Evangelion or anything connected to it.

Notes: Had another moment of inspiration while I was writing for another prompt, and had to it posted here.

Not sure about the length/ending, but once again I'll leave it for now. Enjoy!

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_I miss you. Only the plan you left, which you said would bring us back together, keeps me moving forward._

_Those Fools think they control the outcome of these events, but I have a Key they lack, and will not let them keep me from getting you back. I will use who and what I have to, that I may be with you once again._

_I miss you every single day, but I have waited the past ten years, and I will wait one more for the plan you laid out to come to fruition._

_00000_

_Things proceeds as the plan predicted, everything begins to slowly fall into place. The Boy follows orders nearly as well as the Key._

_I will see you again._

_00000_

_The Girl is now within my control, and with her comes a piece of the plan. The Fools still believe me loyal and under their collective thumb, and grant me another key Tool._

_All according to plan._

_00000_

_The Tool is lost to the Fools, the Key is now fully within my control, the Girl is fallen and unable to stop what happens next, and the Boy is too broken to attempt any rebellion._

_All that must happen, has happened. I need only bid my time until the Fools make their move, and then preempt them._

_Soon, I will see you._

_00000_

_Is this what it has come to? Where did I make a mistake?_

_The Key chose the Boy over her purpose, and the Girl arose enough to grant him strength. The Boy took the Tool and used it against the Fools, but because of the Key he was granted what I had long sought._

_I followed your plan, and yet you turn your back to me!_

_I did it for you! To have you back!_

_Why, when you left me to seek you every single day, do you leave once more? Leave me broken once more?_

… _Why?_


	8. New Arrangements

**Neon Genesis Evangelion**

_Pilot's Table_

By D.A.

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Title: New Arrangements

Prompt: Set 1 / Prompt 36 (Threat)

Word Count: 2096

Rating: T

Summary: Asuka fights off Sachiel in Eva One, and she and Shinji learn of the Angels.

Disclaimer: I do not own Neon Genesis Evangelion or anything connected to it.

Notes: Continuation of "Behold, Eva!" prompt 32, Discover.

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"Why did you do it?" Ritsuko asked as she walked up behind Gendo Rokubungi and Kozo Fuyutsuki. Gendo turned in his chair to glance back at her.

"Do what, Doctor?" he asked, turning back to face the massive holo-display showing the progress of the Angel.

"Bring them both." she said, stopping to stand slightly behind Gendo on his right, just as Kozo stood on Gendo's left.

"It is Human Nature to protect what is important to you when it is threatened. By having both of them here, I ensure at least one will Pilot to protect the other." Gendo smiled faintly behind his hands, "Besides, their relationship reminds me of a certain couple back during college."

000

"_Gendo Rokubungi, get your sorry ass back in here now!" the fiery red-head yelled out the bar's front door, over the sounds of a brawl._

_Gendo straightened his jacket, ran a hand through his hair, and calmly waded back into the fight he and Kyoko Zeppelin Hiryu had started with their argument over…_

_Actually, he couldn't remember what they had been arguing about._

_He shrugged, whatever it had been must not have been overly important. That, or he had been losing._

_Again._

000

"Although…" Gendo murmured to himself, "I don't recall ever being so compliant."

000

"The Eva!" Ritsuko cried, as the mangled, blood-drenched, yet still standing form of Unit-01 was lowered back into the Cage area and slid into place in Cage-7.

Considering the damage, it was amazing Asuka had even won, let alone walked the unit back to a lift.

"Oh don't whine." Asuka commented, wringing the LCL out of her hair as she walked out of the lift from the Plug chamber, watching the orange liquid in disgust, "I won didn't I? I even got it back to the lift so you wouldn't have to drag it back down here."

"But what did you do to it?" she demanded, gesturing at the unit, "And how are you even still conscious!"

Asuka looked at the Eva and shrugged. She'd heard them mention something about a thirty percent something right before the thing had made a grab for her arm and face, but she hadn't really paid attention after that point.

The Eva had certainly looked better, if more terrifying, before it was launched with Asuka Piloting it. The armor was covered in dents, the right hand was crushed, the left shoulder pylon was sheared off, the helmet's paint job had been burned off, and there were two holes punched through the stomach and chest.

"Well, it did hurt," Asuka shrugged again, "But I was a little busy pounding the Angel into the ground. Where's Shinji?"

Ritsuko blinked at the change in subject, then sighed and resignedly pointed Asuka across the catwalk to another elevator.

"Four floors up and down the left hand hallway. Commander's Office. Oh, and there is a change of clothes in the locker room." she said, before walking past her and into the maintenance lift Asuka had just left.

000

Having changed into what is obviously a school uniform, Asuka found her way to a pair of double doors labeled:

**Supreme Commander's Office**

**SCM. Rokubungi G.**

Taking a deep breath, Asuka slid the security card with her picture on it through the reader, and walked into the largest office she had ever seen.

Near the windows at the far side was Shinji. He stood next to a large solid desk, and seated behind it was indeed Gendo Rokubungi, his hands tented in front of his face.

"Asuka, please, come here. What I have to tell the two of you is of the utmost importance to the survival of Humanity."

"Are you ok, Asuka?" Shinji asked, concern faint in his voice. He looked her up and down, but she knew it was a search for injury and not the visual undressing typical of most males. That's just how Shinji was. Though her occasional threats certainly helped a bit.

Asuka tossed her hair as she walked up to the desk, and planted her hands on it's smooth surface.

"Well, well, well. Long time, no see, Gott-vater*." she said, her voice dripping sarcasm, "I was starting to wonder if Auntie Yui and Mama's promise meant anything to you at all."

Shinji winced. Having spent the last fifteen minutes alone with his father, he already knew the man demanded respect and obedience. Neither of which Asuka was particularly good at.

Much to Shinji's and Asuka's surprise, Gendo snorted as he dropped his hands to lie flat on the desk.

"If there is one thing I will not do, it is ignore the instructions and promises of the woman I loved." he nodded to a small picture frame set at the edge of his desk, "Kyoko was like a sister to both Yui and I."

Asuka and Shinji looked at the small photo. It showed Gendo standing slightly off center, with one hand on Yui's shoulder as she sat in a seat to his right, and in her arms was an infant. On his left stood Kyoko, and in her arms was also an infant.

"Knew it," Asuka snorted, "He was never there when it counted."

"Yes, your father, I am afraid to say, is actually a worse parent than I am." Gendo typed at an inlaid keyboard, and a small hologram appeared over his desk, "But slightly more important matters are the concern of this briefing."

The hologram showed the monster Asuka had fought, and next to it was Unit-01. Around these two various readouts told of things like energy-output, reaction time, and percent damaged by the end of the battle.

"You performed beyond our expectations, though your synch-ratio was lower than we hoped. The synch-ratio, however, is not overly important in this case, as the Uint is meant for Shinji. Your own Unit is finishing construction in Nerv-Berlin."

"So how come it hurt?" Asuka asked, carefully eyeing the display, "I _felt_ when it stabbed me, the Unit, I mean."

Gendo watched them both for a moment, then nodded.

"The Evangelion is a cyberneticly enhanced, cloned Angel." Shinji gasped, "The source DNA is buried deep below this base inside the Geofront."

"How does that explain me feeling it when the Eva gets damaged?"

"A synch-ratio is a measure of how in-tune the Pilot is with their Eva. The higher the ratio, the more precise control the Pilot has, and the more they feel what the Unit feels."

"What," Shinji paused, "what keep the Eva from doing what it wants?"

"An A.I. core which is based on the chosen Pilot's own brain waves and thought patterns. The system was designed by the same woman who built the Magi supercomputers used by Nerv."

"So, we synch with ourselves?" Asuka asked sounding dubious.

"Essentially, yes. Though today you were technically synching with Shinji, as he is the template used for Unit One's A.I. core." Gendo responded.

The children glanced at each other, then turned back to Gendo.

"Is that why you called us back?" Shinji asked, "Just to fight?"

Gendo knew he was walking dangerous territory with this question, a result of several oversights on his part. He was appreciative of Kozo at least convincing him to remain in contact with the two, otherwise things might have been worse.

"Yes, and no." he answered, putting as much honesty in his voice as he could, and leaned forward, "While you are needed to Pilot the Evas, we can make new cores and select new Pilots if absolutely necessary."

"Oh." Shinji looked to the floor, and Gendo winced behind his glasses at the glare Asuka shot his direction.

"I had you come to better protect you. You are my son, and there are those who would try and use you to take me down." Shinji didn't stir, and Asuka fired another glare his way. Gendo sighed, frustrated. _Fine Sensei, you win. I'll try this your way._

"I have made mistakes in raising you, Shinji, and I wanted you back to try and correct those mistakes. I will not let the world end, but if it does, I will not let it end with me estranged from my only child." Gendo looked to Asuka and pointed to the photo as he spoke, "And I made a promise once, before I met Yui, that if things didn't work out for us, I would do what I could to make sure it did for the next generation."

Shinji looked up, smiling, while Asuka looked to the side. Gendo sighed again.

"I will continue to make mistakes. I am no more father material than Pieter, but I will make my best attempt. The Angels are a threat to what Yui held dear, and thus a threat to what I hold dear."

"And we have to fight it." Asuka nodded, "It figures. You up to this Shinji?"

"…yeah." Shinji clinch his right hand into a fist, then looked his father in the eye, "I'll do it."

"Good," Gendo said, standing, "I have paperwork to finish, so I will be delay from joining you for dinner. Rei."

The two Children look at him confused, before a young girl carefully steps out of the shadows. Shinji gasped upon seeing the cast around her arm and bandage over her left eye, but Asuka simply took a step closer.

The uncovered red eye, set in a pale face framed by pale blue hair, watched her carefully, waiting for Asuka to speak or move away.

"Who are you?"

"Rei Ayanami, Third Children." the girl replied in a measured tone, looking to Gendo and Shinji before settling her gaze back on Asuka.

"Rei is the Pilot of the Experimental Unit. She arrived four days before you." Gendo said.

"How did you get hurt?" Shinji asked, standing slightly behind Asuka.

"We attempted to start Unit-E two days ago when and part of the software in the A.I. core failed," Rei answered, "causing the Unit to behave erratically before full shutdown was achieved."

"Unfortunately, the A.I. ejected the plug inside the activation chamber," Gendo continued, "and while the LCL is meant to cushion against impacts, it was insufficient in this instance. Now, if you will follow Rei, she will guide you to temporary quarters for the night. Tomorrow, you will be moved into my apartment."

"This way." Rei said, then moved towards the doors at the other end of the long office.

"I'll see you tomorrow?" Shinji asked.

"Yes. Both of you will be taken to the Observation room, where I will pick you up and take you to the apartment and then register you in the local junior-high." Gendo said, sitting back down at his desk, "Good evening Shinji, Asuka."

"Good evening father."

"Guten abend Gendo."

Rei lead the other two Children out, and the door sealed behind them.

"Well, Sensei," Gendo says sensei in a sarcastic tone, "it seems you were right."

"I've spent the last thirty years setting up this outcome." a man, roughly fifty years of age, resembling Gendo but with softer facial features, steps out of the shadows that hide a door, "I had better be right."

"Are things really so different now?"

"Very, but a good very. You're the master planner, I simply pointed you in the right direction."

"Don't sell yourself short," Gendo said sharply, then chuckled, "You learned from the master, you've said, so act like it."

The man chuckled.

"I'm a little older than you, and still don't quite have your confidence. Guess I've still got some more spine to grow."

"Perhaps."

"Rei will be good around them?"

"Of course. She may be the Seventeenth, but free-will lets her be our ally. As I've said, once the Sixteenth is defeated, Lilith will burn. Along with Adam."

"So you still intend to ship the embryo along side Unit-Two?"

"It is convenient, and the Committee will think nothing of it."

Nodding, the man walks back through the door in the corner, leaving Gendo alone to his paperwork, and a framed picture of the only things he ever cared about. Thing only things which ever drew emotion from him.

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A/N:

* German for god-father. Yeah, my translations suck…

Hints at a Kyoko/Gendo relationship like the one implied by Gregg Landsman in his story "Walking in the Shadow of Dreams" is authorized by the aforementioned author. I highly recommend that story, as well as "Nobody Dies", and the "Father Knows Best" trilogy.


	9. Chance

**Neon Genesis Evangelion**

_Pilot's Table_

By D.A. 

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Title: Chance  
Prompt: Set 1 / Prompt 17 (Think)  
Word Count: 1032  
Rating: T  
Summary: A thought, a wish, a second chance.

Disclaimer: I do not own Neon Genesis Evangelion or anything connected to it.

Notes: alternate PoV for the events of "Dreams".

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I think… I think I'd like to try again. To make thing better than they ended up being.

Because…

I screwed up.

Completely and totally f_ed up. I f_ed up my relationships every other time I turned around. I f_ed up my Piloting record, my Eva, and pretty much ever single life I ever came in contact with.

I want it back! Give me another chance! I won't let it end like this! Not with a whimper, not with me dead at the end point of all my bad decisions!

I'll CHANGE!

Just… let me try… I just want another chance. Is that too much to ask? One more F_ING TRY!

…please…

…

Oh great… the f_ing tunnel of light back to reality. So f_ing clichéd it isn't even FUNNY!

000

IT HURTS! Oh SHEISSE, it HURTS! Stop it PLEASE! THEY'RE EATING ME! Not again! NOT AGAIN!

"TOUJI!"

000

"Oooohh" Damn bed… and the same f_ing ceiling…

"Asuka?" I hurt all over… give me a minute…

"Wh…what…" I need a drink…

"Glad you're awake again…" Touji?

"Water…" Now, before I decide to hit you…

My arm hurts…

"Here ya go…" Ah, sweet water, and a full glass of it too.

"What happened?" cause I don't remember past the… yeah, let's no go there for a while

"We killed the Eva series, and got ya out of Unit Two. Kaworu took you to Nerv Medical while I cleaned up the friggin harpies…" And you're still pissed at them? Wow…

"Butchered'em good for me?" lots of little pieces too. I NEVER want to see one again. EVER.

"Real good… the ground crews still haven't found all the pieces." Well, they must be working real slo-

"How long have I been out?" because Nerv is real good about cleaning up our splashy fights.

"Nearly a week… Akagi wasn't sure you'd wake up again." Thanks for worrying…

"Am I gonna be alright…?" please let me be ok… I don't care about my Eva, just let me ok…

"Yeah. Akagi just wasn't sure you'd wake up after the… the 'neural feed-back' from what, uh, what happened to the Eva…" oh… but I'm ok.

"Touji…" I wanna go home…

"Yeah?"

"I wanna go home."

"Ok." wipe that grin off your face, buster.

000

It was a few weeks later that Asuka noticed something was off… and that it was focused on Shinji and the Class Rep.

They were all outside the school for lunch, Shinji and Hikari off under the Favorite Tree, and Kensuke hovering nearby trying to catch her and Touji doing something romantic or violent. Kensuke didn't seem to care, really, beyond the fact that he had gotten bored recording Shinji and Hikari.

She glanced in the other couple's direction, and was surprised at being able to hear them perfectly, and at having two or three sets of memories suddenly snap into crystal clear focus.

"I-I guess… I'd want the same thing. I'd want them safe and happy, with anything that could hurt them far away and long gone…" Shinji paused, then continued in a quieter tone, "Even if it cost me everything I have, everything I am… I'd make sure my friends are safe and happy…"

Asuka smiled. That was Shinji. That was also Touji, though he put up more of a gruff front. Both would do everything they could and more to save the ones they cared about.

"I know you would. I'm glad we got this time," Hikari said, and nodded in the direction of Asuka and Touji, "That they got this time. I wish it was longer."

The world around them faded but for the four of them, and Asuka and Touji walked over to them through the now featureless orange reality, heads awhirl with suddenly clear memories.

"This is where it ends." Asuka said, hand in hand with Touji, as the realization dawned that she knew what had been happening, "The dream's run its course, even if we don't want it to stop."

"We have to wake up sometime," Touji nodded to Shinji, "I'm glad we got to dream at all buddy."

Rei appeared suddenly, a beautiful young adult with waist-length lavender-blue hair and shining crimson eyes smiling at each of them, and Asuka knew, without being told, that it was Lilith.

"I held it as long as my powers would allow. Now the dream fades, and the world comes back from the edge." the woman said as she turned to Shinji, "Reality will be remade by your choices here, dear Shinji."

"Whatever you choose, Shinji, I'll still be here." Hikari said from beside him.

"And so will we." Asuka affirmed, backed by a confident nod from Touji. She had already been trusting him, she realized, without even knowing it.

Shinji closed his eyes and took a deep, shaky breath. When he reopened his eye, there were unshed tears in them, and Asuka could have sworn she heard the faint echo of a woman's voice.

"Remember: As long as you keep living, anywhere can be heaven."

Shinji turned to them and smiled, and they returned the smile with their own. Hikari walked over to him and took his hand in her own, both of them blushing. Shinji turned to Lilith with Asuka and Touji standing firm behind him and Hikari at his side.

"I've made my choice."

"From the shattered remains of the old, a shining new is raised." Lilith said, and Rei appeared beside her.

"From the choices of the Broken Chosen, new paths spread out to the future." Rei continued.

"Ready everyone?" Shinji asked, as the orange reality began to slowly fade away.

"Always, dude." Touji called out.

"Like you could stop me." Asuka said after Touji, gripping his hand more firmly in hers.

"I am, Shinji. I'm here." Hikari whispered.

Rei and Lilith shared a smile, before Lilith gestured Rei to join the group. Her eyes widened in surprise and Rei turned to Shinji and the others to find them smiling, his and Hikari's arms open to her. As she ran to them, tears in her eyes, Asuka thought one last thing as the orange light faded.

Is this our Second chance, our chance for a new start?

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A/N: This just sorta fell from my fingers. Please Review.


	10. I Want Shinji

**Neon Genesis Evangelion**

_Pilot's Table_

By D.A.

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Title: I want Shinji  
Prompt: Set 1 / Prompt 39 (Remember)  
Word Count: 1295  
Rating: T  
Summary: Hikari and Kensuke talk of Shinji and his Eva.

Disclaimer: I do not own Neon Genesis Evangelion or anything connected to it.

Notes: Continuation of "Loss" (chapter6).

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She was going to have a _talk_ with that purple monster…

Hikari stormed down the hallway in Nerv. She wasn't sure which hall anymore, only that the signs were pointing her in the direction of the Evangelion Cages.

She wasn't just storming down Nerv's corridors, though, but the corridor of her memories as well.

000

"Touji!" Hikari screamed as she ran down the hallway outside Asuka's old apartment. The fiery redhead had left last week to Pilot the rebuilt Unit-02 in defense of Nerv-Berlin before Russia made a run at the advanced base.

Touji dropped out of sight, and Hikari did the same as an RPG slammed into the building two floors down from where they were.

"Hikari! Get outta here!" Touji bellowed, leaning slightly over the wall holding a modified AK-74 in his eighteen-year old hands, and fired a burst at the heavily-armed terrorists.

Several rounds bounced off the concrete walls around the two teens as Hikari tried to crawl over to Touji.

000

The last thing Hikari could remember from that day had been a deafening roar, and blackness.

She had woken up in the Nerv Medical Recovery Ward. Misato had come in and told her she would be alright. When Hikari had pressed her about Touji, Misato had explained with tear-filled eyes that he had been in the center of a RPG explosion.

Hikari had cried herself to sleep for the next year and a half before she could think about Touji without bursting into tears, and if what Asuka had said about seeing Shinji was true, then the german had never had chance to heal.

000

"Hey, uh… Sub-Commander?"

Kensuke glanced up from the paperwork on the desk and looked over the edge and down at the Magi stations at the base of the Commander's Roost.

"What is it?" he asked, sounding bored. Which he was. Very bored.

"I have a Pilot the Magi are telling me is deceased accessing the Eva Cages…"

"Which Pilot?"

"Suzuhara, sir."

Kensuke sighed. Why was Hikari here so late? Hadn't she gone with Asuka for her yearly bar visit?

"Don't bother her. I'll be back shortly." he said, neatly stacking the paperwork to the side before getting up and stepping over to the Commander's Lift.

"Yes, sir."

000

"Do you remember, what happened back then?" Hikari asked quietly, "Can you remember?"

Unit-01 remained still and silent, locked down in the cage restraints, as Hikari leaned against the railing with her back to it.

"You managed to prevent Instrumentality, and gave us a chance to lock it away where no one will ever be able to start it again."

Hikari spun around to face the cyborg, her expression so blank it would have made Rei proud had she still been around to see it.

"But you hurt my best friend, in a way I might not ever be able to forgive you for." Hikari, woman of self-control and manners, slammed her fist against the railing, "You saved everyone else, and then ran away again!"

The Eva remained unmoving, a thing of flesh and metal seemingly frozen in time, as Hikari's accusation echoed through the Cage.

"But no, you couldn't just run away. Oh, no. You had to _haunt_ her too!" she jabbed a finger at the scowling visage, "She's cried for years! Because you don't have the decency to either vanish or come back!"

Hikari took a deep breath, looking down as both hands gripped the railing. Sighing, she looked up at Unit-01's face.

"I know it isn't all your fault, Shinji. You aren't the one who chooses to be stuck inside that thing," Hikari scowled, "But you are the one who decides when you get out! So why haven't you!"

In the ringing silence that followed, Unit-01 remained silent and still, and Hikari noticed faint footsteps echoing in the massive room. Turning, she saw one of her old classmates and the current Sub-commander of Nerv-Tokyo-3, Kensuke Aida.

"Wow, Iincho, what set you off?" he asked, his expression one of amusement and curiosity as he walked over next to her and leaned backwards against the railing. His uniform was crisp and neat, but his hair was still longish and messy. All he really lacked was the camera he used to always have in his hands.

Hikari remained just as silent as the Eva, turning back to glare at it. Kensuke noticed she had her hair down, her typical single braid missing, a style she had taken too when they started high school.

"Asuka broke down again." she stated.

"So?" Kensuke said, wincing when he realized how that must sound, "I mean… Come on Hikari, she does this at least once a year since she came back here. Why go off on the Eva now?"

"Because this time I saw the trigger…" she whispered.

"Huh?"

Hikari turned and glanced at Kensuke, then looked back at the beast.

"We saw Shinji." she frowned, "Well, a ghost really…"

"I hope you'll forgive me if I ask just what you're smoking…" he deadpanned, focusing his gaze on Hikari's face.

"I saw him, Kensuke. He was there, but… at the say time he wasn't…" she frowned, "I saw his mouth move, and Asuka responded. Then he just… vanished…"

"Anything else?" he asked, sensing that wasn't all.

"no… yeah, there was one thing…" Hikari looked away, "Remember how you told me one time how you kept getting intermittent pattern blues?"

"…yes…" he answered cautiously, wondering if this might have something to do with the pattern blue they'd detected earlier that night.

"Well… after Asuka started crying, she suddenly asked me if I trusted her," Hikari turned back towards the Eva, biting her lip as she paused a moment, trying to decided if she really wanted to continue, "I told her of course, and suddenly her hands glowed orange and she grabbed my hands…"

"She used her AT-Field… What happened Hikari?" he asked concern obvious in his voice.

"I…I saw Shinji die…" she whispered, the pain evident in her tone.

Kensuke's jaw dropped in shock.

"I watched, from Asuka's perspective, as Shinji _died._" Hikari turned to Kensuke, "I felt like I was watching Touji die all over again. Asuka got to his plug and he was just _gone_."

Kensuke took a hesitant step towards his longtime friend, wrapping his arms around her shoulders as she started to quietly cry.

_You bitch._ he shot a glare at the Eva. He knew the secret of Yui, the woman trapped inside the monster known as Unit-01. _You couldn't just leave us be and keep your precious son. You had to torment us too._

"Hikari," he carefully pulled back, placing his hands on her shoulders as his face took on a determined edge, "Go home, and get Asuka to come in to Nerv tomorrow evening. I have a few matters I must attend to."

Hikari looked at him confused as she wiped the tears from her face, but nodded her acceptance of his request. Turning, she walked out of the Cage back the way she had come. After she left, Kensuke turned back to the Eva.

"You f_ing _bitch_." he said coldly, in a manner reminiscent of the late Commander Ikari. "You wanna mess with my friends? I _knew_ you should have been dismantled."

Kensuke turned to leave the Cage, but as he reached the door to the lift, he turned back and called across the chamber.

"I'm taking Shinji back. And so help me, if you scramble him or keep him from me, I will have you chopped down very, very slowly into lots of little pieces. I know you can still feel, and I will make you _suffer for what you did."_

Stepping into the lift, he missed the faint glow appear in Unit-01's eyes.  
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_A/N: This one was inspired by a song and rereading the other chapters in "Pilot's Table"._


	11. Prepare to Reset

**Neon Genesis Evangelion**

_Pilot's Table_

By D.A.

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Title: Prepare to reset  
Prompt: Set 1 / Prompt 43 (Redo)  
Word Count: 2084  
Rating: T  
Summary: Hikari realizes it was all a dream.

Disclaimer: I do not own Neon Genesis Evangelion or anything connected to it.

Notes: prequel to "Dreams" (chapter 3).

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Hikari, sixteen year old and recently chosen Pilot of Unit-06, walked out of the Eva Cage and followed Asuka to the briefing room. It had been another long day of synch tests, and all she wanted to do was take a shower and go home to sleep. Tomorrow they had only a half day of school, and she and Shinji had planned on going to a quick dinner, to be followed by a movie.

"You know, Hikari," Asuka called over her shoulder, "You can go home if you want. I'll just get the briefing, and tell you what you missed at school tomorrow…"

"No, that's ok, Asuka," Hikari smiled, "I need to hear it anyways, and Misato wanted to speak to me about something."

"If you say so," Asuka shrugged and laughed quietly, "Class Rep to the end, right Hikari?"

"You better believe it."

Both girls laughed, before Asuka called out a challenge and raced off down the corridor. Hikari laughed, but kept to her sedate pace. Reaching the briefing room, she found it empty.

"Hello?" she called, wondering once again if she had become lost in Nerv's many corridors and made a wrong turn while her mind had wondered.

No one answered, so she walked over to the table. Situated at each seat was a small terminal, which included a small intercomm. Tapping the comm. menu open, Hikari brought up the icon for Misato's PDA and started the call. After several rings, it clicked over to the Colonel's automated voice machine. Confused, Hikari left a short message saying she had gone to Room EC-7BR above Unit-01's Cage and found it empty, and that she was going home.

Turning around, she found herself face to face with Rei Ayanami. With a squeak of shock, Hikari jerked backwards and bounced off the edge of the table.

"Ms. Horaki, please follow me." the young girl said, turning without waiting for an answer and walking out of the room.

_That can't be real… Rei… Rei died… _Hikari took a few breaths, _But… Shinji said he had seen her shade before… maybe…_

Walking out of the room, Hikari spotted Rei at the far end of the corridor down near the Deep Lifts, the elevators that took personnel into the cleared out and rebuilt Terminal Dogma. Turning, Hikari followed the apparition.

When she entered the Deep Lift, she found the indicator for Level-EE already lit, so she pressed the close door button and rode the lift in silence. Silence which lasted only a moment before Rei was suddenly standing beside her. Managing to contain herself to simply jumping in surprise, Hikari continued to face forward and waited for the long dead Nephilim to speak.

"I am not dead."

Hikari jumped again at Rei's sudden, quiet assertion.

"But… Shinji watched you be absorbed by Lilith." Hikari spoke quietly, confused, "And then Lilith melted. She turned into LCL and was gone."

"You will see." Rei simply said, and then vanished.

Hikari huffed in impatience, wishing she had just gone home like Asuka had suggested. The elevator slowed to a stop and the doors opened, revealing a dimly lit waiting area.

"Is this Terminal Dogma?" Hikari asked the darkened room, and received only a faint echo in return.

Stepping into the dimly lit room, Hikari heard a voice off down one of the halls that led deeper into Terminal Dogma. Following it, she suddenly found herself in a well lit hall in front of a door marked Room 303, and she could hear a faint beeping from inside. Leaning against the door, she listened and caught a faint voice.

_Shinji?_ Hikari thought, staring at the door before putting her ear back against it.

"Hey, quit foolin' around… Asuka, wake up. This isn't funny anymore." he spoke quietly.

_Asuka! _She gasped, vaguely remembering something about how one of the last Angels had put Asuka into a temporary coma, though they hadn't known that at the time.

"Asuka, wake up! Asuka. Asuka!"

Hikari caught a faint rattle, and then quiet, tear-filled gasps.

"Help me… Asuka, please, help me. I-I need you. Asuka please help me." _Oh Shinji! If only I'd been here instead of evacuating with the others! _"Call me an idiot like you always do, just say something damn it."

"Wake up!"

Hikari gasped, jerking away from the door at the volume of Shinji's cry, and was suddenly back in the darkened corridor in Terminal Dogma. _What… Shinji? But… how…?_ Turning, Hikari caught sight of Rei further down the corridor, waving her over.

"Rei! What's going on?" she called, but was answered with another wave before the blue-haired girl vanished from sight, "Rei?"

Running to the end of the intersection, Hikari looked down both branches of the corridor, only to hear a faint footfall behind her. Spinning around, Hikari found herself face to face with a young boy she had never seen before, but knew from Shinji's descriptions of him after she returned to Tokyo-3: Kaworu Nagisa, final Angel and friend to Shinji Ikari.

"Hello Chosen Hikari. I am glad to see you have cared for Shinji. Far better than I could have."

"Nagisa!" Hikari gasped, taking a step back from the boy, "What's going on? Are you going to tell me you aren't dead too?"

"What you glimpsed a moment ago was both your past, and another's past." he chuckled, "And yet this place we stand in is untrue."

"What are you talking about?" Hikari asked, and felt a faint touch on her shoulder. Turning, she found Rei standing a short distance behind her, "Rei?"

"What you saw was a glimpse of what did happen. But which is ignored and averted here." Rei said, looking past Hikari at Kaworu, "Just as he should not be here, yet was there and will be there again."

"Rei, I don't understand. What happened back there with that room?" Hikari pulled away from both Nephilim, stepping back down the corridor.

"Our time is nearly up, and you have been chosen as the first to openly know what has been occurring." Kaworu said, smiling as he leaned back against the wall.

"Do you understand?" Rei asked, "This was a dream constructed to allow the minds of the Chosen to heal, and to prepare them for the Return to the Beginning."

"What?" Hikari shook her head, "No, this isn't right. This can't be a dream."

"Whether you believe it or not means little." Kaworu's smile turned sad as he looked in Hikari's direction, "Tomorrow at noon, the dream will fade, and the others will have the memory of the dream's construction unlocked."

Hikari knew, suddenly, exactly what they had been saying, and she fell to her knees. She remembered Asuka and Shinji's heated argument inside Instrumentality, followed by her and Touji joining and offering advice and ideas. In the end, they had agreed a dream with a happy ending would give them time to heal before they collapsed Instrumentality and started over. Going back to that first day Shinji set foot in an Eva, they were going to stop Instrumentality.

"And it's time to go back now." she mumbled.

"Unfortunately, yes. The energies which held this illusion are weakening, and soon all must be reset." Rei spoke gently, glancing to Kaworu, "Only the Chosen will remember these events. The four born and chosen to Pilot Eva."

Hikari sighed, giving Rei a small smile as she stood back up. Glancing around, she noticed Kaworu was already gone and that she now stood just inside the surface hatch outside the Pilots' school.

"So I guess I'll forget all this, when you guys go back," she whispered past a fast forming lump in her throat, "Just-"

"No."

Hikari blinked at the force in Rei's voice, and turned confused, wet brown eyes on the blue-haired girl.

"No, you will not forget. You are the fourth Chosen, Hikari." Rei glanced to the floor as she spoke.

"But… You were the first one, right?" Hikari asked, "I'm the Fifth, if you don't count Nagisa…"

"No, Hikari," Rei said sadly, "I am also Nephilim. Asuka is the First, Shinji the Second, and Touji the Third. You are the Fourth Chosen."

"What will happen to you, Rei?"

With a sad smile, Rei turned away. Before Hikari could do anything, she was suddenly in her room at home.

"Rei…" Hikari blinked the faint wetness from her eyes, and slowly turned towards her bed. "What else are you not telling me…"

Confused, saddened, and tired, Hikari dressed for bed, and went to sleep, wondering exactly what tomorrow's deadline would bring.

000

Rei glared across Instrumentality at Kaworu, though this would only be apparent to those who knew her, as the albino Nephilim simply smiled back at her.

"Why did you interfere?" she quietly asked, the annoyance in her voice again obvious only to those who knew her.

"She did not need to see the event." Kaworu sighed, "Why did you try to take her there? Do you really think a little more involvement could make what we have done to the Lilim stain our hands any further?"

"Perhaps not…" Rei directed her gaze off into the depths of Instrumentality, "Am I really destined to end before I even have a real chance to live…?"

Kaworu blinked, _So that is what has bothered her for so long… _he smiled as he turned from her.

"Each of us is granted only one life to live. No more, no less." he grinned, remembering what he had read as he waited for the day Keel would release him, "Did you not read those passages?"

"The Commander considered such things irrelevant." Rei stated, "I never had a chance to acquire the book myself."

"The Lilim ignore much wisdom." Kaworu's smile turned slightly sad, "I wonder if other things apply to 'Angels' like myself."

"We are both part human. Mankind is 'blessed', but do we truly belong on earth?" Rei turned back to Kaworu.

"We are there, for some purpose. Perhaps as the old men believe, but I don't think so." Kaworu turned back to face her, "Instrumentality is a means to an end, not and end unto itself. So we set the clock back to the starting point, so they may have a second chance."

Nodding to Rei, Kaworu vanished into the sea of Instrumentality, leaving her for these last few minutes before the Chosen and all others are released to try again. Wondering, and hoping against hope, Rei soon followed him to seek out the one the Lilim had chosen to call Lilith.

000

Thinking back to the night before, Hikari wondered how the other's memories would be awakened. _Will it just hit them, or will it be more subtle…_

"Hey, Shinji? If you could have anything, what would you wish for?" Hikari asked her boyfriend, glancing at him while they sat beneath a tree in behind the school for lunch.

"Huh?" Shinji said, and winced, while Hikari giggle quietly. _Oh Shinji, she thought_

"You heard me," Hikari gently elbowed him, smiling, "If you could have any wish, what would you wish for?"

"I-I'm not sure…What-what would you wish for Hikari?" he stammered.

Hikari hummed, a single non-committal noise, and looked across the school courtyard. She looked through the glowing noonday atmosphere to where Kensuke was busy with his ever present camcorder, taping everything Touji and Asuka were doing while everyone was eating lunch.

"I guess…" Hikari mused, thinking back to her new, or perhaps old, memories of right before this dream began, and smiled, "I guess I'd wish for my friends to be happy."

Shinji returned her smile, and Hikari could see how glad he was, both at her answer and just being near to her. After a moment, she nudged him, arching an eyebrow. Shinji directed his gaze to his feet stretched out in front of him before he answered a moment later.

"I-I guess… I'd want the same thing. I'd want them safe and happy, with anything that could hurt them far away and long gone…" he paused, his gaze flicked farther from Hikari's face as he continued in a quieter tone, "Even if it cost me everything I have, everything I am… I'd make sure my friends are safe and happy…"

He jumped under her fingers as she lightly laid them on his arm, and gently squeezed. Turning his gaze back to Hikari's face, he found her smiling sadly as she thought once more about what Rei had told her.

"I know you would. I'm glad we got this time."  
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_A/N: This one hit me while rereading the other chapters in "Pilot's Table"._


	12. Bardiel Down

**Neon Genesis Evangelion**

_Pilot's Table_

By D.A.

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0

Title: Bardiel Down  
Prompt: Set 1 / Prompt 38 (Together)  
Word Count: 1499  
Rating: T  
Summary: Pilots together, to the end.

Disclaimer: I do not own Neon Genesis Evangelion or anything connected to it.

Notes: Sort of a prequel to Chapter 2 "I Promised, You Promised". Additional notes at end.

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Asuka slammed her laptop shut and turned to glare out the window, as several chairs over Touji sat in near total confusion as to what he had done to get that response. Hikari, two chairs in front of Asuka, glanced back at her childhood friend and sighed, shaking her head with a sad smile on her lips.

Touji frowned back at Hikari and then looked back down at his screen, mentally going over what had lead to his last statement and thus her response.

_Shouldn't a said I used to like Hikari…_ he groaned, _shoulda just asked her what she meant, like most dumb jocks…_

Putting his face in his hands, Touji sighed and wondered for the tenth time why he was taking his little sister's advice and trying to get to know Asuka.

The door to the class room opened, and as the teacher walked in, Touji decided to try and apologize at the apartment. _But I still don't think Asuka likes me._

000

_So much for figurin' out what's wrong at the apartment_…

Touji frowned inside Unit-02's entry plug as he and Asuka waited for the Angel to crest the hills between them and the Matsushiro facility. Both of them cradled the newer railgun given to Nerv after the disastrous attack of the thirteenth Angel.

"Have we heard from Misato yet?" Asuka, secure in Unit-01, asked over the radio for the fifth time in the last fifteen minutes.

"No, not yet." was Lt. Ibuki's reply, "I told you, when we hear from them I'll let you know immediately."

"I know, I know."

"Geez Asuka, ya'd think you were worried or somethin'…" Touji mumbled.

"Despite what your Otaku stooge friend says behind my back, I am not a heartless demon!" apparently not quietly enough to avoid Asuka's good hearing. Though at least she was talking to him again.

"Fer cryin' out loud Soryu," Touji whined, "I was jus' jokin'!"

"Well it wasn't funny, Stooge!"

"Target now cresting the ridge!" Maya yelled over their argument, just as the Angel's head appeared over the hill.

"That's the new Eva unit!" Touji yelled.

The black and pink Unit-03 slouched its way over the hill, swinging its arms back and forth limply. Eyes glowing red and jaw hanging open, almost seeming unhinged, the Eva/Angel was perhaps the most unnerving either Child-Pilot had seen so far.

"Moving out!" Asuka yelled as she ran her unit towards the Eva, "Is it Piloted?"

"Unknown." Maya replied, "We can't get any telemetry from the Plug."

"Engaged and destroy the angel." Kozo order, "Retrieve the Entryplug if doing so does not put you at risk."

"…Understood." Asuka spoke, hesitating only a moment before dropping into a kneeling position and aiming her rifle. Extending her AT-Field out to erode the Angel's, she opened fire at it's knees.

The rounds blasted into the suddenly unoccupied terrain as the Eva/Angel flipped through the air to land on Unit-01's shoulders, slamming it face first into the ground as Asuka screamed in surprise.

"Asuka!" Touji screamed from his seat inside Unit-02, as what felt like the entire world came crashing down along with Asuka's Eva, even while he raced to reach her before the Angel could kill her.

The obviously violent and Angel controlled Unit-03 snapped Unit-01's right arm backward and tore it from its socket, then proceeded to slam its newly acquired weapon against the armor over the Plug Socket. All the while Asuka alternated between raging at the Angel, and screaming in pain. After a moment, Asuka stopped screaming, and the Angel suddenly seemed bored.

Touji froze. In an instant, it felt like he had just lost everything important to him. And it HURT.

Screaming incoherently, Touji rammed the butterfly handles forward and launched his chariot at the Angel. Slamming into it, he wondered why it had been so easy to hit it. His thought was answered a moment later when the Angel dropped out of his grip and spun its arm against the back of his knees, dropping him to the ground.

It had wanted him close.

Rolling to the side and onto his stomach, Touji pushed off with his hands and feet like a frog, leaping a short distance away. Catching himself, he rolled his Eva into a crouch, ready to leap at or away from the Angel, only to receive a punch to the face.

Reeling back, Touji reacted on instinct. Blindly swinging his fist up and around, he felt it connect with the Angel just as the stars left his vision. The Angel responded by flipping Unit-02 through the air towards Unit-01.

"Damn." rolling to his feet, Touji tapped a switch set into the face of the left joystick, revealing the Prog. Knife in the left pylon. Drawing it, he hoped he knew what he was doing.

Seeing Unit-02 draw the weapon, the Angel snapped its arms up and flicked them at Touji. Extending like a bungee cord, the Eva's arms reached across the distance to wrap around Unit-02's neck. Beginning to choke, Touji slashed into the Angel's left arm, the knife's blade biting deep. Shrieking in indignation, the Angel release its grip with that hand, pulling it back as the Prog. Knife slide from the cut, and viciously backhanded Unit-02.

Touji spun and slammed to the ground, stars coating his vision for several seconds before he rolled to his feet. His vision cleared just in time to see Unit-01 backhanded by the Eva/Angel with its rubber like right arm, sending her to crash down next to Touji.

"Asuka!" Touji cried, then crouched as the Angel possessed Eva charged him.

"Get its core," Asuka gasped over the radio, "Save the Pilot."

Right as the Angel reached him, Touji smashed his right thumb down on the switch simply marked Spike L.

The Eva/Angel stumbled and slammed into Unit-02, and Touji promptly stood and flipped it behind him. The possessed Unit-03 slammed to the ground, and Asuka in Unit-01 dropped to it's knees next to it. It was at this point that Touji noticed the extra damage to both Unit-01 and Unit-03, damage which must have been incurred while he was trying to clear his head.

"Don't be dead, please don't be dead…" Asuka's murmured prayer could just barely be heard over the radio as she attempted to remove the Plug from the defeated Eva with only one hand. Suddenly cold inside, Touji moved over and gently moved her aside and he carefully pried the armor plate off and then used his recovered Prog. Knife to pry the Entryplug free. Seeing Unit-01 kneel in preparation for ejecting its Entryplug, Touji called over to Asuka.

"Asuka, wait fer the medics-"

"NO!"

Touji jerked at the vehemence in Asuka's voice, but carefully set the freed Plug gently on the ground. Ejecting his own Plug, Touji scrambled down the emergency ladder to the ground, and raced over to where Asuka had crashed to the ground. Despite her obviously limp right arm, Asuka had managed to climb the nearly sixty feet from Plug to ground before slipping and falling the last ten.

"I have to make sure I didn't kill him…" Asuka gasped as she tried to stand, "I won't be a murderer."

"Then wait here while I check on it!" Touji spoke firmly, gently pushing Asuka back down, careful to put his hand high on her left shoulder to avoid being called a pervert, as he knelt next to her.

"Fine," Asuka growled, panic still flitting through her eyes, though her expression was hard, "Be quick about it."

Nodding, Touji stood and raced towards the slightly bent Entryplug. As he reached the small emergency hatch, Touji noticed that it looked different from his and Asuka's Plugs. White with red trim, instead of the Eva's number stenciled on the side it simply read Dummy Plug-A.

_Please don't be dead. Please, please don't be dead…_

Opening the hatch, Touji glanced inside only to see a mass of piping and sparking circuitry still thinly coated in LCL, the majority of which now pooled on the ground.

"There's no one inside…" Touji called back, both confused and relieved, "It's just a big computer…"

Turning, Touji looked back to find Asuka had passed out. Jogging back, Touji checked her plugsuit's wrist block, and seeing the steady flash of the heart monitor he then stood and jogged back to his Eva to call in the med-evac VTOL.

Climbing back out, Touji jogged back to Asuka. Sitting down next to her, he carefully lifted her head enough to carefully balance it on his leg so it wasn't on the ground.

"That was too close to home, huh, Asuka?" he murmured, glancing over at the downed Eva and bent Entryplug. "Us Pilots gotta stick together…"

_Way too close… There's only two of us, so we can't lose anyone. _Touji thought, _So I'm not gonna let you ignore me. We're gonna work together to keep those kids safe, and see this to the end. Even if the end kills us._

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A/N: If you haven't noticed, in I'm Needed, the order in which the Angels appear is altered from canon. In chapter 2 of Pilot's Table, I mention Asuka and Touji had just battled Bardiel, and Touji had been trapped inside Unit-01 before that, like Shinji after Zeruel in canon.

Up to the 13th, the order is unchanged. The 13th in I'm Needed is Zeruel, instead of Bardiel. The 14th is Bardiel instead of Zeruel. And Kaworu appears, without an Eva, before Armasael, though he is still considered the seventeenth.

Arael and Armasael also trade places.

In short, the order of third through seventeenth is as follows: Sachiel, Shamshel, Ramiel, Gaghiel, Israfel, Sandalphon, Matriel, Sahaquiel, Iruel, Leliel, Zeruel, Bardiel, Armasael, Arael, Tabris.


	13. Christmas short

**Neon Genesis Evangelion**

_Pilot's Table_

By D.A.

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0

Title: Merry Christmas  
Prompt: Set 1 **/ **Prompt 18 (Share)  
Word Count: 969  
Rating: k+  
Summary: Christmas party special.

Disclaimer: I do not own Neon Genesis Evangelion or anything connected to it.

Notes: Takes place at some point after the end of I'm Needed. Author's notes at the end.

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"Why do they have me here? I mean, I know these kids are supposed tuh have chaperones, but…" Touji grumbled under his breath as he served another student a ladle of punch.

"Careful how you serve that!" the student in front of him spoke in an aggravated tone, which snapped Touji's attention from Asuka across the gymnasium back to his ladle.

Which was now pouring punch onto the table.

"If you don't like how I'm serving, then you do it!" Touji snapped back as he put the ladle back in the bowl, then blinked when he realized it was that delinquent student.

"Thank you." the boy said, a little more politely, and stepped around the table to take the ladle. Seeing his opportunity, Touji decided names could be remembered later and quickly took off his green apron and passed it to the student. Before the kid had begun to put it on, Touji was already halfway across the gym.

Reaching Asuka, he noticed Hikari and Kaworu had joined her while he was dealing with the student.

"Hey Touji." Asuka smiled, "Who'd you trick into taking over at the punch bowl?"

"That shifty-eyed guy," Touji shrugged, "The one who's always with the Palmtop Tiger."

"Takasu Ryuji?" Hikari asked, "You know he's not a bad guy. And the girl's name is Aisaka Taiga."

"I didn't say he was," Touji defended himself while wrapping an arm around Asuka's waist, "Just he looks like it. Like how everybody always assumed I was a dumb jock."

"Some people still do." Kaworu lightly commented in his faintly musical voice, earning a chuckle from the others, even Touji who gave him a friendly slap on the back.

"Anyways," Hikari, grinning happily, began once the chuckling ended, "As I was telling Asuka, Touji, Kaworu and I are expecting!"

"I always thought Kaworu was a girl." Touji quipped.

And was promptly smacked in the back of the head by Asuka, closely followed by Hikari, while Kaworu simply chuckled at the joke.

"Hey , come on!" Touji complained as he rubbed the back of his skull, "Kaworu though it was funny… Anyways, congrats!"

"Thank you." Hikari and Kaworu replied in unison, smiling, just as the main lights went out and several spotlights focused on the curtained off stage at the far end of the gym.

"Look," Asuka spoke, nudging Touji in the ribs with her elbow, "It's Taiga-chan and Ami-chan's duet."

"Their what?"

"SHHH!"

_Here, Christmas, lots of smiles,_

_A party night delivered to you._

_Here, Christmas, lots of wishes,_

_I vow to you on this holy, holy night._

"When did they practice this?" Hikari asked, unknowingly echoing Ryuji's own words as he stood behind the punch bowl across the gym.

_The Christmas this year is a little special,_

_Even if it's not a white Christmas_

_The illumination of the star dust, piling up on the ground._

_Kira kira shining, everyone is happy._

_Chika chika winking, everyone is seeing their dreams._

"I let them into the music room after school for an hour each evening." Asuka smirked as she tapped her foot to the rhythm of the song.

_The Christmas this year, will definitely be special.A lonely Christmas would be are illuminations, let me decorate it for you._

"Actually, Taiga does kind of remind me of you, Asuka." Hikari commented.

"Feeling a bit nostalgic are we?" Kaworu teased quietly.

_Here, Christmas, lots of wishes,_

_I vow to you on this holy holy night._

"Maybe a little, for our time in high school." Hikari blushed, gaze going distant, "But not for the battles."

"Amen tuh that!" Touji agreed.

"I remember with joy our first Christmas after Seele's failed attack, once you and I had been freed, Asuka." Kaworu spoke lightly, pulling Hikari close and glancing to Asuka as he finished speaking.

"Yeah…" Asuka frowned, subtly leaning into Touji as he stood slightly behind her.

"I hated when you where in isolation…" Hikari whispered, "But it was the best Christmas present I think any of us ever got, when you were released Christmas Eve night."

"And here we are now, normal teachers at a normal high school." Touji said, but when the others gave him a look, he added sheepishly, "Well, as normal as anything can be with us. I'm just glad we get to share it."

0808080

A couple of hours later, once the party had ended, the four retired Pilots gathered again under the glow of the shining Christmas tree, ready to head for home and their warm beds.

"Well, see ya guys later." Touji said as he and Asuka gave their long time friends a hug and handshake goodbye, "See ya when classes start back up."

"I know I don't need to tell you two to keep safe." Asuka added, smirking slightly as she stepped back. "And again, congratulations."

"Thank you, and the same to you, my friends." Kaworu returned as he then pulled Hikari close, wrapping her in a protective hug. "Until then."

With a flash of his red eyes, a sensed-more-than-heard hum, and a ripple of power, a black circle opened beneath the couple, who sank into it. After a bare moment, the circle shrank and vanished.

"I don't think I'll ever get used to that…" Asuka murmured as she allowed Touji to wrap his arms around her waist, "Ready?"

Feeling Touji's gentle nod against the side of her head, Asuka drew upon her S2 organ just as Kaworu had done. Opening her own Sea of Dirac, the two fell into the inky blackness. After a moment, it suddenly seemed as if they were floating up, and they rose from another black circle in the center of their living room.

"I'm home." she murmured.

"Welcome home," Touji said, hugging her, "Merry Christmas."

"Yeah," Asuka smiled, turning her head to look at Touji, "Merry Christmas."

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A/N: Well… all I can say is sorry for the delay. RL has been a little odd, and put me off of writing for a little while. As an apology, I've got this Christmas special up, and hope to post the next three roughly a week apart, starting after the new year. Might have a New Year's special before then, we'll just have to see.

As you've already seen, this is a crossover with Toradora! And, obviously, starts before Taiga and Ami's performance during the Christmas party in the gym. Set roughly ten to fifteen years after the final events of I'm Needed… which I haven't even written, though I have the basic idea for it…

Read and Review.


	14. 18th Choice

_Neon Genesis Evangelion_

_**Pilot's Table**_

**By D.A.**

**0**

**0**

**Title: 18th**** Choice  
Prompt: Set 1 / Prompt 6 (Trust)  
Word Count: 2771  
Rating: T  
Summary: "When you see what I am, will we still trust each other?"**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Neon Genesis Evangelion or anything connected to it.**

Notes: Takes place at some point before events in "Dreams", "Chance", and "Prepare to Reset". Part 1 of 2

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"Free-will, right?" Asuka yelled at Kaworu, "Why are you doing this if you have free will when all the other Angels didn't? What about me?"

"You are the Eighteenth, the Angel of Choice. What good is my free will, if I never had a choice." Kaworu said in a matter-of-fact tone, "Each of us built upon the last. I am more than the sixteen who came before me, and you are more than me."

Misato stared, unable to reconcile the sight before her with what she had come to accept as true. Angels burned cities, they didn't take care of kids. They destroyed lives, not lived them.

But as Asuka floated in the air in front of the massive white form of what Misato now knew was Lilith, she realized that she would have to let go of her hatred if she wanted to avoid losing the young girl that was her daughter in all but name and blood.

Hikari couldn't believe it either. Sitting within her chariot, having beaten down the Kaworu-controlled and partially rebuilt Unit-03, she could do no more than Misato. That, and switch between hoping Touji got there in time, and hoping he never saw this.

In front of Asuka hovered Kaworu Nagisa, the boy who had just openly declared himself the Seventeenth and challenged her to stop him and accept her fate as the Eighteenth Angel as she kept him from Lilith.

000

Ten minutes prior:

"Pattern Blue detected in the Evangelion Regeneration Cages!" Makoto yelled, and in an instant the bridge became a scene of controlled chaos.

"Bring up a visual and deploy the Pilots!" Misato yelled as she ran into the bridge, closely followed by Ritsuko.

"Asuka isn't responding, and Touji is in the tram on the way down to the Geofront." Maya alerted the bridge, "Hikari is on her way from the Ready room to the Cages."

"Send Section 2 to find Asuka, track her Nerv cellphone!" Ritsuko said as she moved over to a station near Maya's.

"Video on screen!"

And then silence reigned, as the suddenly regenerated Unit-03 stood and began to break out of the lightly armored Regen. Cage. On its shoulder stood the Fourth Children: Kaworu Nagisa.

"Fourth Children is the source of the Pattern Blue, reclassifying as 17th Angel." Maya said shakily, "Magi confirms change of designation."

"Where is Asuka!" Misato yelled over to Makoto, who jerked away from his station just as the Angel alarms change tone.

"Second Pattern Blue detected!" Makoto yelled, face pale, "It just left the Regen Cage, and has passed the first Pattern enroute to Terminal Dogma!"

"What?" Misato yelled, "Get the pilots in their Evas NOW."

"I have a visual of the second pattern…" Makoto said, then pressed a key.

"No…" Misato murmured, watching in horror at the image now displayed on the massive holographic display, the double caption reading both First Children and 18th Angel, before turning and bolting for the door.

000

Present:

"So it's my choice." Asuka glanced down, frowning in thought, "MY choice, not your's, not the commander's, mine."

"Yes, the choice is your own." Kaworu smiled, and Hikari finally realized what he had been implying with his challenge. Both the Seventeenth and the Eighteenth turned when they heard the strangled gasp that came from Unit-04's external audio. Hikari had backed her unit into the wall beside Heaven's Gate, and dropped to the ground.

"My choice Kaworu. Things don't always go the way people want when I get my way." Asuka swung her gaze back around to Lilith, her eyes blank, as Hikari finally spoke.

"Please, not Kaworu." she choked, "There has to be some way…"

"Only my way." Asuka said tonelessly, and her eyes flashed.

"NO!" Kaworu cried, unable to stop the cross-blast that struck and vaporized the lower half of the Second Angel, and he froze as Asuka screamed, wrapping her arms around her waist as she fell to the ground.

It HURT when she did that. Why did it hurt though? Was she connected to Lilith instead of Adam? Maybe. Well, she was going to finish this if it killed her. She didn't want to die, she really didn't. But it was her CHOICE. Always her choice. She wasn't a DOLL!

Where did that come from?

Asuka groaned as she sat up and gingerly shook her head. Blinking, she cleared her vision and glared up at Kaworu.

"You can't have things both ways!" Asuka roared, eyes flashing as she fired another blast that knocked Kaworu out of the way, then a third blast that left behind only Lilith's hands nailed to the massive cross.

"You can't have free will and still be forced to merge with Adam!" she gasped, "Free will is being able to make a choice."

Kaworu sank to the ground, falling to his knees as he stared at where Lilith had hung, and watched the hands rapidly dissolve into LCL. The pipes that once were embedded into Lilith's back now hung scorched and useless.

They all heard the hydraulic hiss as Hikari ejected her entry plug.

Running across Lilith's chamber, Hikari flew past Misato, past the barely standing Asuka, and straight to Kaworu.

"Why?" Hikari asked quietly, lightly placing her hands on Kaworu's shoulders as she dropped to her knees in front of him, tears visible at the corners of her eyes, "Why did you try to get yourself killed?"

"Because if I died, The Council would lose. They need Adam, but after Kozo burned him with the Lilim's artificial sun, he became lost." Kaworu said tonelessly, "So they decided to use me, by making me bond with Lilith, because I was genetically the same as Adam."

"But why not just do what Asuka did?" Hikari demanded quietly, fiercely, tears slowly slipping past her rapidly blinking eyes.

"Because I am still an Angel, and Adam and Lilith are the first of us." he finally looked Hikari in the face, and smiled painfully, confusion and sorrow readily visible in his eyes, "Could you kill your parents, if all they did was ask you to come home?"

Hikari pulled Kaworu into a tight hug as tears slowly began falling down his face, realizing for the first time just how much Asuka's mother must have hurt the girl with her death.

"Are these… tears?" he asked, voice filled with a mix of wonder and sorrow, "Am I… crying?"

Hikari shushed him, gently rocking them both back and forth like she had done for her younger sister after their mother had died, tears falling from her own eyes.

As Hikari cradled Kaworu while he wept, Misato walked over to the barely standing Asuka. The redhead seemed to take no notice of Misato's approach, instead she looked out over the LCL lake with half glazed eyes. Before Misato could say anything Asuka half-turned towards her, looking at her from the corner of her eye.

"I don't know what to do." she said, "I couldn't kill Kaworu, and Nerv's job is to kill Angels."

"He's not a threat anymore." Misato said, "Asuka-"

"And me." Asuka cut in, her voice shaking ever so slightly, "I'm an Angel too."

"It doesn't matter."

Misato and Asuka spun in surprise at the voice, and turned to the deep shadows back behind them in the direction of the personnel door Misato had used.

Asuka's eyes widened when Touji stepped out from shadows and began walking towards them, slightly out of breath and still in his track pants and white, now sweat soaked, t-shirt.

000

Five minutes prior:

"D*** it!" Touji gasped, turning and running into the male pilots changing room, "Of all the days I take the long way, it had to be when a' Angel attacks the place! And not jus' one, 'cause that'd be too easy!"

Tearing open his locker, Touji yanks his track suit jacket off and tosses it behind him.

"The 18th Angel has been identified!" Maya's choked voice over the loudspeaker jerks Touji to a halt just as he pulled his plugsuit from the locker, "It's… It's Asuka! No! No, no, no-" ~_SCREECH_

"All Evangelions to Terminal Dogma, I repeat, All Evangelions to Terminal Dogma!" Makoto's voice replaced Maya's, "Hikari, Touji! Get down there and stop Unit Three and Kaworu! Worry about Asuka later!"

"Asuka…" Touji's mind was amazingly calm for someone how just found out he'd been living with the enemy. But then, he would admit, he was a rather simple person. Not simple as in simple minded, but simple in that his view of the world was relatively basic. Good guys help you, and bad guys hurt you. Good guys try to save the world, bad guys try to destroy it.

Asuka had always helped him and his little sister, and helped those twins she lived with before that. She always worked to the limits of her abilities to stop the Angels, and pushed Touji and Hikari to do the same.

"U-unit Four engaging rogue Unit Three!" Hikari's shaken voice announced, and Touji realized the bridge had hit the base-wide switch.

Bolting out of the changing room he ran straight to the elevator Misato-san had told him led down to Terminal Dogma.

"Please let me get there in time!" he prayed.

000

"Weren't ya listenin' to your own speech?" Touji glared, walking up to Asuka and standing stiffly in front of her, "Ya made a CHOICE, Asuka! Ya just took out half of the reason for this whole mess, and the other half was already gone!"

"I'm an ANGEL, Touji!" She cried and grabbed his collar viciously while screaming in his face, "I've spent the last year fighting them, and the four years before that training to fight them! And now I find out I AM one!"

"What's your point?" Touji yelled back, hurt tinged his voice, "Don't ya remember our promise?"

Asuka flinched and jerked back, but Touji grabbed her shoulders. Misato's eyebrows climbed as she listened to them. _How did I miss this between them…_

"The. Promise. Asuka." he ground out.

"I promise I'll help you…" she whispered, looking down.

"Tuh keep'em safe…" he continued, waiting for her to look back up.

"And I won't ever leave you…"

"Jus' don't leave me." He finished, "I said then you're too important to me for me tuh leave."

Asuka's shoulders shook slightly as Misato blinked at the revelation that the two had shared with each other the promise Asuka had made while Touji was trapped inside Unit-01. The promise she screamed at Unit-01 the night it released Touji onto the catwalk, right at the girl's feet.

"I wasn't kiddin'."

Asuka took a deep, shaky, breath, and reached up and took hold of his hands on her shoulders. Gently holding his hands, Asuka stepped up to him and leaned against him in a near mirror of that evening weeks ago. Misato simply stared in amazement as the self-proclaimed Asuka the Great, someone who claimed they would never need anyone, allowed her mask to slip.

"It hurt, Touji." she whispered into his chest, "Like some cross between when my Eva would be hit, and that feeling when I thought I was being forced to kill another Pilot."

"I got ya…" Touji whispered back, gently holding her, "It's done now."

"Ok." she murmured, determination filling her voice, "what now?"

"First," Misato said, carefully, almost gently, interrupting the moment between the two young teens, "We get out of here. Hikari, bring Kaworu. He can hide out at my place until Seele is dealt with."

"Ok," Hikari called over her shoulder, then gently got the boy Angel to stand, "Come on Kaworu, let's go."

"Misato-" Asuka started, only to be cut-off with a sharp wave of Misato's hand.

"Can it, Asuka." Misato snapped, then took a deep breath, "Yeah… The angels took my father away and hurt a LOT of people… but you two didn't."

"Misato, what'll we do 'bout Seele?" Touji spoke up as he and Asuka started walking back to the personnel door, while Hikari lead Kaworu to them before running back to her Eva.

"Rits said they might try a frontal assault using the Eva-series." she said, grim faced, "If they do, we'll need all of you at your best. We might have as little as twenty-four hours."

"But three to one?" Hikari asked over the external speakers, sounding doubtful, as she guided Unit-04 through Heaven's Gate, "And Makoto-san is trying to reach you. I'll tell him we're on the way up."

"You'll do fine." Misato said, then finished to herself, "Or it's all over."

000

Asuka and Touji walked into the apartment they shared with Shinji, Rei, and Mari. Stepping into the living room, they found all three kids sitting around the coffee table in the center of the room. Mari sat on one side, a concerned look on her face, and Shinji and Rei sat on the other side looking exhausted.

"Welcome back, Asuka." Rei said, exhaustion obvious in her voice, "I guess you fixed all of our problems."

Asuka's eyes widened, and she dropped to her knees next to Shinji and Rei, gathering both in a hug.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know it would hurt you." she apologized, "When I did it, it hurt, but I didn't think it would affect you."

"It's o-ok." Shinji said, "It didn't hurt that much. Rei thinks that's because we're more Adam than Lilith."

"And," Mari jumped in, "Adam only called, he wasn't connected with the other Angels or anything."

Mari then blinked, looking at Asuka funny, and tilted her head to the side a little.

"Did you say it hurt you too?" she asked, then grinned, "Are you an Angel like Rei-chan and Shinji-kun?"

"Mari…?" Touji looks at his sister with a mix of confusion and surprise, "Did they tell you that?"

"um… no." Mari murmured, looking off to the side, "It was a lady… she looked kinda like Rei-chan, but she was more grown-up."

"What? When?" Asuka looked around the apartment, nervous and no longer exhausted, "Is she still here?"

"No," Mari replied nervously, "It…It was a while ago… I guess the same time as the fight with the fifteenth…"

"What did she say, Mari?" Touji asked calmly, walking over and picking her up.

"Just that I had Angels for friends, and they would need me to help them adjust to being free." Mari smiled, "She said one day you would remove the bait, and be free. That must be today!"

Touji and Asuka shared a look of confusion, wondering if it had been Lilith, or the dream-Rei that had visited little Mari. Touji shrugged, and Asuka smiled back. It didn't matter which one had found Mari, she had made it so the little girl would be there for them and not fear them.

"Yeah," Asuka whispered, just loud enough for the kids and Touji to hear, "Must be…"

000

"Commander, I think you have some explaining to do." Misato said menacingly as she walked past the Section 2 guards at the door to Kozo's office, who saluted her, and marched across the massive room to face the man who thought he held most of NERV's cards.

For Misato, her forty-five Magnum was the ultimate trump card.

"Ah, Kasturagi. I was wondering when you'd arrive." Kozo turned his chair around, bringing the lighting in the room up to normal, "There is much planning to do before Seele plays its last three cards to begin Third Impact."

The simple and direct admission of guilt made her pause, but only for a moment. Snarling, she reached across the desk and grabbed the faintly grinning man by his uniform's jeweled collar.

"I want the truth, you b**tard." Misato drew her sidearm and removed the safety, "And I want it now, or we find out just how important you are to running Nerv."

Kozo paled slightly, but otherwise did not react. "I believe it is really quite simple, Katsuragi. The Children are the key to it all."

"Start from the top." releasing her grip on his collar, she shoved him back to his chair.

"The Children are Nephilium." he began.

"Toji and Hikari aren't." Misato interrupted.

"Would you like the answer or not?" Kozo snapped, "Even Toji and Hikari have some genetic tampering to make them more capable in synchronizing with the Evangelions. All the Children do."

Misato took a threatening step forward. She couldn't _believe _what Nerv had done, just to fight the Angels._ Toying with childrens' genes-_

"It was Yui's plan, and Kyoko's." Kozo said more quietly, freezing Misato in place as he looked down at the surface of the desk, "And Rokubungi went right along with her."

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_A/N: This chapter, while almost directly connected to events in "Chance", is actually part one of two. Part one deals with I'm Needed's version of episode 23, while part 2 deals with I'm Needed's version of End of Evangelion. Thus, "Dreams", "Chance", and "Prepare to Reset" are three different points-of-view of the epilogue to I'm Needed.`_


	15. Home

Neon Genesis Evangelion

Pilot's Table

By D.A.

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Title: Home

Prompt: Set 30-b/ Prompt 019 (found)

Word Count: (2000+)

Rating: T

Summary: The NERV crew makes one more attempt at getting Shinji back.

Disclaimer: I do not own Neon Genesis Evangelion or anything connected to it.

Notes: Well, this is my first fiction written out of country. I'm on deployment, and oddly enough feel more like writing now than back in the states. 2013-Jan/Feb Also, I've lost my file of prompts, so I had to get a new set. Starting with this chapter, I'll be using the 100-prompts tables from Still aiming for a Min of fifty, but we'll see.

Partly inspired by the Harry Potter soul-bond fanfic "H. J. Potter" by S.M wane.

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"Are you sure you didn't miss any notes?" Kensuke asked again, almost absentmindedly.

"No sub-commander, I didn't miss any notes, and I've rechecked all the calculations." Maya Ibuki said, sighing. With several more years, and several more PhDs under her belt much like her senpai, Maya was the picture of calm and wise. "Relax, Kensuke. The only way this won't work is if Dr. Yui actually fights it or Shinji refuses to leave."

"Yui is the one that worries me." Kensuke almost spits the name, "its why I asked Asuka to be here. Maybe her presence will give Shinji the boost he needs to get passed his mother..."

"If we fail, the depression it could cause her to fall into might be almost instantly fatal." she whispered.

"I know. I spoke with Hikari, Asuka has basically been the walking dead since she came back to Tokyo-3. We essentially lost Asuka the day we lost Shinji." Kensuke gestured out the observation window at the catwalk Asuka was standing on, "heartless as it sounds, we either try to get him back, or start planning Asuka's funeral."

000

"Can you hear me, Shinji..." the redhead whispered.

The thirty-four year old young woman stood patiently on the catwalk before the behemoth. Despite the years since she last stood there, she looked very much as she had then. Perhaps more mature physically and mentally, with the barest hint of wrinkles across her forehead, but the same crystal blue eyes and blazing copper-red hair. The years seemed to have almost passed her by.

"Stupid question... I know you can, you told me you heard Misato when she called you back then."

-Asuka, we're about to start the recovery program.-

"Alright, I'm ready." she looked up at the control room to see Maya and Kensuke looking down to her, then turned back to the Evangelion as faint a whirring and beeping started to pick up.

"I need you Shinji, I never got a chance to tell you."

-Link established, beginning command reroute.-

"I can't live with just a ghostly visit every few years when your mom decides to let you out." Asuka tuned out everything else, focusing only on talking to Shinji. And reaching out with her AT-Field. "I know you can hear me, and I'm begging you to come back. Please Shinji, don't-"

She stopped, her eyes locked with the suddenly glowing ones of the Eva. She noticed, in the back of her mind, that the talk coming from the control room was panicked, but paid that no mind. Like last time it would be Shinji and his mother, not the machines, that decided if he returned.

"Please, Yui, give me the love of my life back..." tears now coated her cheeks, her hands gripping the railing in a white knuckled hold as she raised her voice to yell, "damn it, give me back my Shinji!"

A ripple flowed over the surface of the S-2 organ in the center of the Eva's chest. Asuka gasped, hands to her mouth as she hoped against hope and took one step back. Another ripple, and the form of a young man was visible in the dull glow of the sphere.

"Shinji..." she whispered, then a faint orange glow reached out from the core and entwined with the glow from her hands, and all went black.

000

"Hello Asuka."

The gentle voice of a woman behind her caused Asuka to open her eyes upon a blank orange vista, devoid of any features. Turning, she finds herself face to face with a woman the spitting image of a brown haired and green eyed Rei. Yui Ikari, Shinji's mother and bonded soul of unit-01.

"Hello Yui."

"I'm sorry you've been hurt for so long." And the look on the woman's face, a face not any older than Asuka's, and the tone of her voice tell Asuka she truly regrets the pain Asuka has endured. "It's so hard to connect with the outside, I never knew the passing of time was so quick compared to what I can perceive here."

"What about Shinji's visits, hm?" Asuka demanded, "explain how he can visit me and see the passing of time, yet you still keep him to yourself!"

Yui flinched at Asuka tone, wrapping her arms around herself.

"I never knew he was visiting you. Perhaps he didn't really know either..."

"I want him back, Yui!" Asuka screamed.

"Asuka...?"

The quiet, awed whisper of her name was like a roar in the silence after her cry, and she whipped around fast enough to lose her balance.

Only to be caught in the strong arms of a very familiar young man about her age. Looking up passed those arms to the face she could recall perfectly from her dreams and the apparitions she'd glimpsed, tears began pouring down her cheeks.

"Shinji..." whispered, hopeful and almost desperate, voice and tone twisting at the young man's heart, Asuka dared to believe what she saw.

"I'm here, Asuka." he whispered, his eyes tracing over every inch of her face as he helped her to stand and face him.

Crying his name over and over, voice filled with relief and joy, Asuka threw herself into his arms and held him with everything she had. Shinji returned the embrace, relief relaxing his frame as he whispered her name in her ear every time she spoke his. After what seemed to be hours yet at the same time seconds, Asuka pulled back from Shinji enough to look up slightly at his face.

"I love you."  
"I love you."

Their words mingle and mesh, and as they register what the other has just said joy lights their faces. Both of them grinning like idiots, Asuka presses her lips to his, and the world around them fades out of their awareness with only faintly spoken words following after.

"I'm sorry, my son, for what you and she endured because of my folly. I can only spend the last of this curse's power to grant the two of you a single blessing."

000

From their vantage point in the control room, with all their attempts to recover Shinji failing faster than they can keep up, Kensuke and Maya see the orange glow flow from Asuka. As they watch, a second glow pushes out from the Eva and connects with hers, wrapping her in a rapidly brightening orange glow as the tones quiet and lights dim.

With a flash of near blinding orange light, the cage was empty of all but a pair of small bodies laying on the catwalk. Where the Evangelion had stood was now an empty suit of armor and the cracked red sphere that had once been an S-2 organ.

"What's" Maya cleared her throat, blinking to clear her vision, "what happened...?"

"I don't know, but that better be Asuka and Shinji down there..." Kensuke grabbed at his wrist, activating the small communications bracelet there, "Medical team to the Evangelion cage, two down on catwalk seven."

Putting a hand on Maya's shoulder, Kensuke run out of the room.

000

Light forces its way into his eyes, and the cold panelling of what he is laying on tells him he is not in bed. Forcing his eyes open, blinking at the brightness, Shinji's first sight is the smooth face and red hair of a young woman he knows well. A face he was so very afraid he would not get to see again.

"Asuka...?"

His voice is hoarse, scratchy, but it is enough. Asuka stirs, her eyes fluttering open as she adjusts to the bright cage lighting. She freezes, her eyes widening, the instant she sees him staring at her.

"Shinji..." hesitant, tears in the corners of her eyes as a fragile yet hopeful smile touches her lips, she reaches out and cups his cheek, blinking away more tears as she feels the warmth of his skin against her palm, "you're really here... I got you back..."

"I'm here, I came back." a smile splits his face as he assures her, and with a cry Asuka grabs him close. With Asuka pressing her face into his chest as she sobs, telling him between gasps how much she missed him, neither of them notice when Kensuke runs up to them on the catwalk and gasps.

000

Laying on the catwalk before Kensuke, holding each other so close they looked like they'll never let go, are two people who look barely out of their teens. Even so, Kensuke recognizes them both, and drops to his knees. It never really hit him how much he missed his best friend til now, and he was willing to bet that even Touji would be in tears at seeing Shinji back.

Running up behind him, Hikari gasps as well, dropping to her knees next to him and whispering Shinji's name.

"He's really back, Asuka got him back..."

000

Tears slowed, breathing evened out, Asuka lifted herself up slightly and looked down at Shinji. He looked younger than in the Eva's dream world, but he was there, and her heart told her it was Shinji.

"I love you." she said, grinning, "I think I loved you since you talked to me after the 14th, when I told you to leave and you ducked under the tape and held me anyways."

Shinji returned the grin with his own soft smile, "I loved you since we piloted your Eva together against the sixth."

"You look beautiful," he murmured, brushing his fingers through her hair, "almost like the day I asked you to the dance, before-"

Asuka did not let him finish, pressing her lips to his in a kiss both gentle and so full of emotion it stopped all thoughts in his mind.

000

"Asuka."

Hikari's gentle call startled both pilots. Shinji and Asuka bolted upright and turned to face the other two on the catwalk, but stayed pressed against each other's side, unwilling to put any more distance between themselves than necessary.

"Let's get you both dried off and in some clean clothes." she smiled, gesturing towards them, and they both suddenly noticed they were drenched in LCL.

The group stood, and with Shinji and Asuka hand in hand, they left the cage for the old pilots changing room, walking right passed a gaping medical team. Kensuke and Hikari separate from the two at the doors to get uniforms for them until they could get their own, while Asuka and Shinji enter the curtain divided locker room.

Quickly showered and wrapped in towels, the two pull back the curtain in perfect sync and sit side-by-side on the bench on the male side of the locker room. Shoulder to shoulder, fingers meshed together, the two relax and enjoy the presence of each other.

*I could sit here with you forever*, Asuka thought as she turned enough to look at Shinji's face.

"Same here Asuka." Shinji spoke quietly, glancing at her and smiling.

"Same what?" she questioned, startled slightly, "I didn't say anything..."

A slight frown marred his features as he titled his head to the side, "I'm sure I heard you say you could just sit with me forever."

Eyebrows drawn together in contemplation Asuka focused on Shinji, covered his eyes, and thought, *Don't open your mouth Third Children. Just tell me you love me*

*How am I supposed to tell her I love her if I don't open my mouth...*

Asuka's eyes widened, "Shinji, pay very close attention to how you hear what I say next."

"OK...?"

*I want you to tell me how you hear me right now.* Asuka thought, then lowered her hands to her lap.

"It...was in my head...?" Shinji answered hesitantly, earning a grin from Asuka as she nodded once in confirmation.

"We can hear each other's thoughts?" his eyes lit up as he watched her for her reaction.

"So it seems my baka." she grinned, leaning into his side again and sighing.

This was how Hikari and Kensuke found them, leaned into each other and occasionally chuckling.

000

"Well, it seems you're both perfectly healthy twenty-something year olds." Looking at the surprise on Asuka and Shinji's faces, Maya chuckled, "I don't understand it either. Just be glad you've both got an extra ten to fifteen years added on."

"That's not all." Asuka commented, then glanced meaningfully at Shinji.

"We can hear each others thoughts if we're directing them to each other." Shinji spoke, seeming a bit hesitant, "we don't know the range yet, we kinda don't feel too eager to test how far we can get just yet."

Shinji's ending comment earned a chuckle from Maya and an elbow to his ribs from Asuka.

"Well, if the de-aging and telepathy are the only effects of getting you back and drenched in both LCL and a powerful localized AT-Field, then you're free to go." Maya smiled, "just stop by the sub-commander's office before you leave."

"Will do, see you later Maya." grinning, Asuka grabbed Shinji by his wrist and dashed out of the med-bay, leaving a content Maya and Shinji's parting goodbye in her wake.

000

*You didn't have to run all the way here* Shinji thought to Asuka with a chuckle, *I'm sure Kensuke isn't going anywhere for a bit.*

*Relax love, I haven't been able to run like that in years, and you haven't had a chance to either* she returned, laughing out loud in the corridor as she tapped the call button to let Kensuke know they were there.

Shinji smiled at her, warmth filling him at her use of the endearment, *I know*

"Come in!" Kensuke called, his joy evident in his tone, even muffled by the door.

Opening the door and stepping into the office, Shinji quickly spots the small markers that say this was most definitely his friends office. A few ship models rest on a book shelf that holds a mixture of military and NERV manuals and history books. On his desk stood action figure sized models of unit-01 and unit-00. The sight of unit-zero draws a twinge of pain in Shinji's chest. He knows his half-sister died the day he was absorded into unit-one, when she rejected Gendo's plans and stopped Seele.

"So, how are you Shinji?" Kensuke asked, smiling at his two friends, "eager to get home and to bed I suppose?"

"Yes, but I have a favor to ask first." Shinji says, grinning at his friends inuindo.

"Anything Shinji, just ask." the sincerity in Kensuke's voice tugs at Shinji's heart, drawing his attention to just how much he was missed, and not just by Asuka.

"Do you know any good jewelers?"

Both Asuka and Kensuke share a confused look, before Kensuke grins, then laughs. Asuka huffs in annoyance, knowing she is now the only one clueless, a state she never enjoyed.

"You don't waste time now do you?"

"I've been gone for over thirty years, right?" Shinji replies, smiling, "I have no excuse to take my time."


	16. Just Breathe

Neon Genesis Evangelion  
Pilot's Table  
By D.A.

Title: Just Breathe  
Prompt: Set 1 / Prompt 15 (Breath)  
Word Count: 1500+  
Rating: T  
Summary: Every lifetime from within Instrumentality took it's toll on them. But in the end it only made them stronger. Strong enough to save Humanity. And more importantly, strong enough to save each other.  
Disclaimer: I do not own Neon Genesis Evangelion

Notes: Hope you enjoy it. It was satisfying to write, and I felt better once it was off my chest. I honestly think it's one of my best chapters.

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_Just breathe._

_Take a slow, calm, deep breath. Focus on what's right in front of your eyes._

Shinji slowly opened his eyes, and before he blinked, before he tried to get them to focus, he saw red.

Like copper.

Like Asuka. She leaned over him, the dim orange sky backlighting her with her hands planted on either side of his head and her knees beside his waist, watching him blink once and finally focus on her face. Then he smiled, shaky at first and then firm and strong, and focused solely on her.

And it made her breath catch in her throat. And when it seemed like she'd stopped breathing at all, Shinji shakily took a breath.

It's like a signal, and both of them exhale. The air leaves them quickly, a burst of breath that washes over each other's face, and they gasp in air. In synch, just like when they trained to fight Israfel, they breathe for a moment. Sometimes gasping, sounding like they're holding in sobs. Sometimes moaning, a sound filled with pain and fear, and a touch of longing. Sometimes whispering, each other's name on their lips as they exhale, a touch of despiration filling the sound.

Finally, something snaps inside Shinji. Asuka sees it in his eyes, and knows she doesn't want to hear words yet. Just as he opens his mouth to speak, she darts her head down the last few inches separating them and their lips meet.

And it was nothing like their first.

Their first was part curiousity, part desire, part boredom. And it hurt afterwards. It had felt so right in the heat of the moment, but when he finally pulled away desperate for air they both knew it had been the wrong time and wrong reasons.

It had crippled them from being there for each other every single time after, always afraid in the back of their mind that if they tried to care and let the other in that it would destroy them, no matter how much they wanted to help each other. And then Instrumentality wrapped them in it's illusionary embrace, and they had to face those unthought fears.

But this time, it was like a lifeline. Full of a desperate need to know the other was really there, that they weren't alone, that they admitted they needed each other.

Their second was one long kiss, lips smashed together like they were afraid something might pull them apart and pressing for as much contact as possible. Then, they pulled back for a moment, eyes open and searching, nearly panicking as they looked for confirmation in each others gaze. And finding it, they smiled shakily at each other before Shinji gently placed his hand behind her neck, and pulled her back for another kiss.

Their third kiss was gentle and short, and quickly followed by a fourth, a fifth, and more. Each gentle, like they simply didn't want to stop and were content with the silence.

What could have been moments later, or hours or days, they stopped. Asuka rested her cheek against his as they simply listened to each other breath, their hands gently tangled in each other's hair.

And slowly, finally, the panic began to slip away and their memories return. So many memories.

Memories of laughter, and contentment. Of rage, and crying. Memories of school, and NERV. Of home, and family. Memories of what felt like a hundred lifetimes. So many memories they wondered how they could hold it all in their minds and keep any of it straight. And they latched onto the same solid strand running through each and every one; they were always together, one way or another, at one time or another, before or after someone else. Always.

They opened their eyes, and storm met ocean.

And they just breathed.

"I'm sorry"

They spoke in synch, and each knew what the other meant.

"I love you."

And they just breathed, the world around them not mattering. Even as they heard splashing and gasping as others surfaced, people that lived there returning from their own Instrumentality. Even when Misato ran up to them, dropping next to them with tears in her eyes, but not touching them when she saw the identical looks on their faces. Faces she would later describe as being so young, but with eyes that seemed so old yet full of equal parts love, sorrow, and happiness. Eyes that were focused only on each other as they slowly breathed in synch.

They didn't look up when Toji and Hikari, holding hands like the other might vanish if they let go, walked shakily over to them and sat down on the opposite side from Misato. They didn't stop when Gendo crawled out of the sea and collapsed nearby, a sobbing wreck of a man as he whispered 'I'm sorry' over and over again. They didn't stop when Kaji found Misato, and the two collapsed together, the man holding the sobbing love of his life. They'd didn't stop when Ritsuko crawled out beside Gendo, took his hand, and just held him as he turned and put his face to her shoulder and let every lifetime of loss and guilt pour out with his tears while her own tears fell silently on the top of his head.

Eventually they blinked, once, quickly, as if afraid the other might still vanish if they looked away for too long.

"I love you." they murmur, "And I'm sorry I took so long."

_Just breathe,_ Asuka thought as she bent down for another kiss, _Just breathe, and focus on what's in front of you._

0o0o0o0

_Breathe, Hikari, focus on breathing._ Hikari Horaki told her self over and over as she stared up at the slowly brightening sky. _You're ok, just breathe and then you can get up._

Slowly the panic ebbed until the pins-and-needles feeling faded from her lips and fingers, and she shakely tried to sit up. Closing her eyes tightly as she pushed up, she missed Touji bolt upright beside her. But she didn't miss his gasp and could hear his rapid, panicked breathing. Snapping her eyes open, she swung her gaze to him so fast that in the back of her mind she was suprised she didn't get whiplash.

"Touji."

The whisper of his name was enough to draw his gaze to her face. When their eyes locked, both stopped breathing as a thousand thoughts filled their minds. A thousand memories, a thousand lifetimes. Life with each other, without each other. School, Nerv, home, far apart and close by.

And just like that, the panic was back. Clinching their throats tight and wrapping iron bands around their chests, spots already starting to dance before their eyes.

"Breathe," Hikari gasped, strangled sounding, "just breathe. We're alive, Touji, I'm alive."

"Hikari...?" her name escapes his throat in a choked sob, and despite his normal macho attitude he doesn't care that he's crying, because she's there. They're both there, and he feels the panic recede as the realization takes hold. And reaching out, he gentle brushes her cheek, and the panic pulls back from her mind too.

"Touji!" she cries, and pushes off from where she sits and throws herself into his chest, burying her face in his shoulder and sobbing.

Catching her, he sobs with her as they both let the memories settle in their minds and accept the knowledge. Instrumentality, an event thought to mean the end of mankind and the merging of every mind into one being. Instead, because of Asuka and Shinji, it gave every person on Earth what seemed like a thousand chances to live their life.

And it changed some,it broke others, and some never came back to the surface, having chosen to stay inside the false world that Instrumentality gave them.

"We're ok, I'm ok."

And just like Asuka and Shinji, they speak in synch. They say it over and over, simply holding each other as they gradually convince themselves and each other that what they're saying is true. Eventually, they quiet down, simply holding tightly to each other and gradually relaxing.

After what seemed like hours, they pulled back and looked at each other. And sighing, they nod, and help each other stand. The memories of losing each other, all the varied ways you can lose someone, hanging in their minds as they watch each other. But they don't let it change the now.

They're together now, so they just walk to where they know, without understanding why, that Shinji and Asuka are.

And they breathe.

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A/N: Hope you liked it. I'm tempted to try and write a similar one for the other two couples I mentioned, Gendo and Ritsuko as well as Misato and Kaji. But it'll use a different prompt. Expect it!


	17. Things You Miss

Neon Genesis Evangelion  
Pilot's Table  
By D.A.

Title: Things You Miss  
Prompt: Set 1 / Prompt 46 (Missing)  
Word Count: 1500+  
Rating: T  
Summary: Instrumentality showed them every way they could be crushed, and every way they could be happy. And in the end, it made them choose. Reach the surface and crawl out on shore, or be lost forever in Instrumentality.  
Disclaimer: I do not own Neon Genesis Evangelion

Notes: Hope you enjoy this one as well. It was a bit of a struggle to write, as I'm not a major fan of these four characters. I hope I got a their perspectives in-character, though obviously I get some leeway since they just got out of Instrumentality. I also wanted to try and do my own take on them, maybe expand on their characters.

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The panic he felt when he finally reached the surface was enough to almost to paralyze him and let him sink down to drown. Using the last of his old self's iron control, he forced himself to shore before he collapsed, before what he had experienced inside Instrumentality overcame every scrap of self-control he had left.

Instrumentality had shown him, by letting him live his life over and over, everything he had missed. From the few short years he had with Yui after Second Impact, to the time he could have had with Shinji before Sachiel had made his appearance, to the life he could have shared with Ritsuko. Every missed moment was laid bare before his mind while he was lost inside Instrumentality.

And it broke him, chipped away at the steel grip he had on his sorrow. Sorrow that had wrapped tighter around his heart every moment after Yui was lost, tighter with every moment away from Shinji. And it piled guilt on top. Guilt for every decision that hurt Shinji, guilt for his manipulation of Ritsuko, even when he knew he was slowly falling for her with every secret shared and night spent together and denying it every second with his continued plan for Instrumentality.

And as he finally saw his son only a dozen feet away with the girl, the young woman, he had chosen to be with, Gendo Ikari broke down for the first time in decades and sobbed.

"I'm sorry," he gasped between sobs, "I'm so sorry."

He sobbed and gasped and begged, collapsed to his knees and arms wrapped tightly around his stomach as he fought both the almost gut wrenching sorrow of every missed moment and stomach turning disgust at his former actions.

And not once did the two acknowledge him.

0o0o0o0

Ritsuko gasped as she broke the surface, taking in lungfulls of air. Real air, not the illusion of Instrumentality that had almost trapped her within the idealized world she had wanted ever since Gendo had begun manipulating her.

At the thought of Gendo she immediately turned, and spotting him kneeling on the shore, she made her way to the beach and crawled out of the surf towards him.

Some called her obsessive, which in many ways she was. She was somewhat OCD, and often short tempered as a result when things would not go as she had meticulisly planned out. But when she heard others describe her as obsessive, she didn't think of those things, she thought of Gendo.

She could admit it now, after Instrumentality had shown her the various ways they could have worked together, lived together, even killed each other during the many End Games that could've lead to Instrumentality. She was, almost until the end, obsessed with Gendo Ikari. Not until things began to fall in place for his planned Instrumentality did she begin to look inward and examine herself.

And what she saw turned her stomach. Instrumentality pulled it all to the front of her mind, all the twisted ways she could have lived and died in her obsession with Gendo Ikari and her misguided jealousy of the attention he paid to Rei.

And at the same time it showed her that passed that, she had truly fallen for Gendo. That if he would change as a result of his own experience inside Instrumentality, he just might love her back.

So she crawled to him, and hearing his sobs she froze. She had never once heard him make any sounds that could even remotely be mistaken for sorrow or regret. But she was beside him now, and he was sobbing as he begged for forgiveness from his son.

She took his hand, gripping it as tightly as she could while she noticed Shinji and Asuka nearby, the two surrounded by Misato and Kaji as well as Hikari and Touji. And it shocked her when, as if her touch was a signal, he twisted where he was kneeling and grabbed her in a bear-hug and cried into her shoulder. She placed her hands around his shoulders, and when she realized he had changed what he was saying her own tears began to fall into his dark hair.

Because his plea was directed to her specifically now, and he was unknowingly telling her the words she had wanted to hear since she tried to stop him in Terminal Dogma.

"I'm sorry for it all, Ritsuko," he sobbed, "I love you, and I'm sorry I missed it for so long."

0o0o0o0

The first thing she noticed was missing, was that her side didn't hurt. Not like a numb not hurt, but a whole and healthy not hurt. The next was a roof, she distinctly remembered being in a hallway.

And then her life, or lives, began to flash before her eyes and cement themselves in her memory. Every possible moment with Kaji, and NERV, and the Children. Even memories of teaching at a school, of having her own children, of babysitting the kids of the Pilots. And it hurt, not because it was too much to take in but because it was all false, all memories made inside Instrumentality.

But two thoughts anchored themselves at the front of her mind, Kaji and-

"The Children," she gasped, then called louder, "Shinji! Asuka!"

She stood shakily, eyes focusing down the beach in what she somehow knew was the direction they were, and took off running. Not even noticing as Kaji surfaced where she had just a few minutes before.

She ran until her lungs were burning, and finally spotted the two of them, Asuka crouched over Shinji as he lay on the beach. When she got closer she realized they were kissing, and it hit her with a mix of joy and surprise. She was so happy they finally let each other close, but still somehow surprised they'd done so at all.

And just as she reached them, before she could pull them both into the mother of all hugs, she caught sight of the expression on their faces and the look in their eyes. And it took the breath from her lungs and dropped her to her knees.

"You aren't my Children anymore," she spoke quietly, not noticing the tears trickling down her cheeks, "You grew up in there, and I missed it..."

And it hurt a little, missing them growing up. Sure she had her memories of Instrumentality, memories a hundred times over of them growing up, and yes she wasn't their actual mother. But somehow, the look in their eyes said they had grown up without Instrumentality. That somehow, they had shared the same dreams inside Instrumentality, dreams no one else saw.

And she missed it.

And then Kaji wrapped his arounds around her. And as even more tears poured from her eyes she realized she had a chance to see some of the things Instrumentality had shown her she missed in her search for revenge against the Angels.

0o0o0o0

The last thing he remembered, before the haze of Instrumentality, was being shot and then hearing doctors saying something about life-support. Thus, he was understandably confused when he found himself a few dozen feet off shore and perfectly healthy.

Confused, and feeling a stab of panic as he watched Misato take off down the beach and realized he was going to miss his chance to tell her in-person what he had left on her answering machine. Something Instrumentality had forced him to realize he should have told her years ago instead of letting her run away after college.

As he reached shore and began to follow her at a jog, he thought through all the memories that flowed through his head. Memories of so many lifetimes he could've had with Misato. Memories of the Children, and of children that could've been his and Misato's. Memories of NERV, and a school. Memories of ways his obsession with Truth had stopped him from getting the things Instrumentailty tempted him with, of ways his obsession could have gotten him killed so much sooner than it had.

He accepted that he had missed a great deal of his life when he let her go and chose to seek the Truth. And in accepting, he chose to not let it slip through his fingers now that he had a second chance.

Walking up to Misato he spotted Gendo on his knees nearby with tears pouring from his eyes, but he ignored him and instead watched Shinji and Asuka on the beach in front of Misato with Touji and Hikari nearby.

And he heard the two of them say something he felt honestly glad he hadn't missed as he took Misato into his arms and held her as she sobbed. Something he was afraid he would never hear Asuka say to anyone, let alone the two of them towards each other.

"I love you," they murmurred, "And I'm sorry I took so long."

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A/N: Hope you liked it. This is a companion piece to Just Breathe, and like that one is another take on what could have happened when they woke up on the beach when Shinji chose to end Instrumentality.  
I also want you to go read Little Moments and its sequel Breaking Point by shadows59. A scene near the end of Little Moments was inspiration for Just Breathe.


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